Everything
by Darveyiscanon1
Summary: Everything is on the line for Harvey when he receives a call that shocks him to his core. The last person he ever expected to hear from was now threatening him. Season seven ish.
1. The Escape

***This fic does contain violence so please be careful***

**I am extremely nervous and excited to share this fic. This idea has been sitting my vault for a long time and I finally got around to planning it all out. I hope you enjoy!**

It was an ordinary day at the office, but for whatever reason she felt different. Something about that Friday was unlike the others. She wasn't sure if it was just her urge for the weekend or the Webster case that had been going on for nearly a month now which was finally being brought to court tomorrow, but something felt strange to her.

Donna had been feeling off her game for months now, though. Ever since she found out about Harvey and Paula, she's had a wrench in her stomach. She liked Paula and she was happy for Harvey, but she couldn't shake the feeling it gave her. It almost felt as if she was forgetting something every time, she left the house or the office. Maybe that missing piece was him, but she would never know. Telling him that, however, was not an option. That was the price she paid for knowing him better than anyone. After _the_ _Other Time, _she knew he wasn't ready for them, so instead she continued their platonic relationship. But now seeing him with her, she couldn't understand why he grew up for Paula, but couldn't when she needed him to way back when.

The pain of that thought alone was worse than any other she had ever endured before, but she was Donna and she wasn't allowed to let herself falter because of him. Not now, not when they have come this far. While they didn't have _everything_, deep down she still had hope that maybe one day they would.

She would always have faith.

…

Donna decided to stay late that night even though Harvey had told her they didn't need any more help. Knowing him, she knew he did. Even though he hadn't given her anything new to look over, she stayed to go through some of the stuff she already had. She didn't mind staying late and she was well aware he wasn't leaving his office anytime soon so, she stayed in hers too. Maybe he would realize he needed her help with something and call for her, unaware that she didn't follow his order to go home.

Late night calls were their thing. If he ever needed something, she would be there in a heartbeat and she knew if roles were reversed, he would be too. That was the kind of relationship they had. Over the years they had gotten as close as two people could get, without being more.

They were always there for each other and because she knew how important this case was to him, she would stay as long she needed until he knew everything was okay.

…

The day had passed by quicker than he had anticipated. The Webster case was working him harder than any other case prior to it. He wasn't sure what it was about the client, but he was deeply invested in making sure Henry got every penny that he deserved for his company.

He knew how good of a person he was and having Mike as a protégé had clearly influenced him heavily. Harvey never used to get emotionally invested in his clients. The winning was what it was all about, for him, at least what it used to be about. He used to think it was Donna's influence, but he quickly realized it was Mike's too. He was the kind of lawyer Harvey wished he could be. Even though he would never admit it, that's why he loved working with him. He was the Robin to his Batman and having him around made him a better man. There was a need to be better now, though he still couldn't pinpoint why.

As him and Mike continued to hammer out some more work on the case, Harvey noticed his friend hiding the yawn growing. They had been at it since nine in the morning and now it was almost midnight. Without hesitation, Harvey threw the file down on the coffee table and sat back to relax. "Go home, Mike. We've done all we can, and we need to be on our A game tomorrow."

Mike was clearly not ready to throw in the towel quite yet as he picked up a highlighter to finish marking up the paper near him. "It's fine. I'm fine. I can't leave before you. You can't stay later than me, you're not even presenting this case tomorrow."

"I'm going home too. I promise you, there's nothing more we can do," he explains as he pulls the rest of the paperwork away from Mike. "Just make sure you get a good night's sleep and kiss your fiancé good night."

He nodded in agreement and gathered his belongings. In a swift motion, he packed everything into his bag and was quickly heading home for the night.

The two of them had been having nights like this for almost a week now. He was fueled by his fellow lawyer's dedication to the case. They were down to the final day and they needed as much prep as they could get, but he knew Mike would be of no use if he didn't get his rest.

He contemplated staying a little longer to finish going over the discovery he was already working on when he heard a knock at his door. The visitor was definitely a surprise. "You're here late," she teased.

He was unsure why Donna had still been at the office. Harvey had told her to go home earlier when she asked if there was anything else, she could do to help with the case. "I could say the same to you. Why didn't you go home earlier when I told you to?"

Her eyebrows raised. "Since when do I do what I'm told?"

He let out a soft chuckle that consumed the quiet space. "Fair point."

She walked over and sat on the edge of the couch, one of her favorite places to sit in his office besides behind his desk. "How do you feel about tomorrow?"

There she went. Always knowing exactly what he needed to talk about. She always had a way of saying exactly the right thing at the right time. "Honestly, I'm nervous."

Donna was visibly surprised by his response. "You're nervous? I don't even remember the last time I saw the great Harvey Specter nervous for a trial."

"I don't know why, but this case is different. I can tell how important it is to Mike and I don't want to let him down. I also know what a good man Henry is, and he deserves my best. I'm scared I won't be good enough," he mumbled.

She placed her hand on his shoulder to comfort him. "If there is one thing I know, it's that no one stands a chance against Harvey Specter. You are the best goddamn closer this city has ever seen, and tomorrow's trial will be no exception to that." She gently caressed his back with her palm. "Go get some rest. We have a big day tomorrow and even Batman needs his sleep."

He loved the sound of "we". They were a duo, one of the best. Hearing her call, them that almost made him forget about Paula, until he felt the buzz on his leg and read the name on his screen. Paula was also working late and texted him to inform him of that. He hadn't even realized that he never checked in with her earlier up until that moment.

Ever since Donna told him about how him being with Paula bothered her, he felt different towards her. It had always been him who was feeling jealous of her relationships and now the roles were finally reversed. He's not sure why but knowing that comforted him for some strange reason. She was the one who had made the rule way back when and although he wasn't ready then, he was now. But he respected her enough to not break the rule, so he entered a relationship with someone else.

"We do and I will. Do you need a ride to the courthouse tomorrow? I can have Ray pick you up."

She smiled at the gesture. "That'd be nice, Harvey. I'll be ready by seven, if that's okay?"

"Perfect. See you then and get home safe." He watched as she got up and turned on her heels towards the door.

She turned her head and looked back at him. "I'll bring the can opener," she whispered as she continued around again towards the door.

He watched as she walked out of his sight, his smile disappearing the second she did.

…

About twenty minutes later, he finally finished his readings. He could barely keep his eyes open anymore, even though he was three coffees deep. Although he was exhausted, he was glad he stayed to finish up. Tomorrow was going to be a good day for them in court, he could feel it.

He knew he should take Donna's advice and head home. Although he wanted to do something else to prepare, there was no more work to be done. He had to trust that, him and Mike know what they're doing for tomorrow. There was no way they were going to lose this case.

As he continued to organize the files before heading out, he felt his phone buzz. Then again. And again.

He wasn't sure what was so important at half past twelve that he needed to receive three texts in a row. Once he opened his messages, the words on the screen nearly made him drop to his knees.

**MIKE: Harvey, you need to see this. It's all over the news. "****Convict Escapes Prison****"**

As he clicked on the link, the image of the escapee rocked him to his core. It was Frank Gallo.

**HARVEY: Holy shit. Be careful. Have you spoken to Donna or Louis?**

**MIKE: I texted them both the same link. Louis just replied.**

His heart sank as he realized her name was missing from that message.

**HARVEY: She hasn't answered?**

**MIKE: I'll let you know when she does. She's probably just getting ready for bed. Be careful.**

The words on his screen didn't help settle his stomach. He would not be okay until she let him know that she was fine. His fingers were dialing her number before his brain even realized. He needed to hear her voice, but there was no answer. The voicemail he left her was definitely "interesting" enough to deserve a call back.

He could feel his patience running low as he waited for her to call back. No matter the time, she always answered the phone and knowing this didn't help his nerves. Of course, he could only imagine the worst now that he had that running through his head.

Although the panic had set in, he managed to calm himself down. There was no way he would try to hurt Donna. He would want to hurt him, so he wouldn't target her, right? Thinking about Gallo laying a hand on her made his blood boil.

Maybe Frank had ran off and got away to start a new life. He wasn't even positive he would try anything. Did he really hate him that much that he would waste an opportunity like this on revenge? He could be halfway across the country right now.

As he was getting lost in his thoughts, his phone started to ring. The number on the screen was unknown to him, which nearly caused his heart to stop beating.

He answered the phone. "Who is this?"

"You mean to tell me you don't remember me, Harv? I don't think it's been that long." The voice on the other end sent a shockwave throughout his body. _Gallo. _As soon as he recognized the voice, all of the awful thoughts he was thinking before flooded his mind again. The worst was actually happening.

"Hard to forget a man you convicted, Gallo. I heard you escaped. How'd you manage that?"

The man laughed on the other end. "I have my ways. I'm sure you know that. I had to get out of there, though. There's something I gotta do," he paused as he caught his breath. "Are you afraid yet?"

"I'm not afraid of a coward," Harvey fired back.

"You should be. You should be VERY afraid of the man you took EVERYTHING from," Gallo yelled into the phone. He was clearly angry, and all of his rage was directed at him.

Harvey swallowed as he pulled the phone away from his ear on impact. "You had to pay for your crimes, Gallo. The only person to blame for that is you." He had no idea why he was still entertaining this man, but something told him he didn't call to say hi.

"You act all high and mighty, Specter. I got news for you, you're not untouchable. And now you're going to _pay_ for what you did to me," he spat into the phone.

Harvey shook his head, unsure of what the criminal meant. "What the hell does that mean?" There it came again. Panic.

"I want two million dollars within the next three hours."

Harvey laughed into the phone. "And why the hell do you think I'm going to give you a dime?"

"Because like I said, you're not untouchable. You took everything from me, now I'm going to take away _your_ everything. If you don't get me the money, I'm going to kill her. This is why you don't care for people, Harv. Caring makes you weak."

He shot up from the couch and quickly gathered his things as he began to run out the door. "I swear to god, if you lay a hand on her-"

"What? You'll kill me. Get me the fucking money and bring it to her apartment. Oh, and if you call the cops, she will be dead as soon as I hear a siren." Before Harvey could say another word, the line went dead.

He could feel his heart pounding through his chest. This was why she hadn't answered his call. He knew something was wrong the second Donna let her phone go to voicemail. She always answered his calls whether it was six in the morning or ten at night. Suddenly he felt his chest began to tighten. The feeling was all too familiar and then went his breathing. It was becoming rapid and irregular and that's when he knew. _A panic attack_.

The sweat began to drip down his body as his eyes widened. The realization that Donna was in trouble was seemingly too much for him. He began gasping for air as he thought about it more and more. Frank Gallo had escaped from prison just to get his revenge on him. But Gallo wasn't going to hurt him, he was going after the one person in this world that mattered more than his own life.

It was as if his tie had started wrapping tighter and tighter around his neck. His balance was no longer stable as he wobbled all over, falling left and right. There was no longer a feeling of being in control of his own actions, his body was disobeying everything his mind was telling it to do. He felt as though he was now watching himself from the outside, no longer connected to his body.

This couldn't be happening to him, not now. Donna needed him more than ever and he could succumb to the fear. He made his way over to the water, fumbling over his furniture on the way there. He twisted off the cap and chugged as his free hand loosened his tie.

He closed his eyes and pictured her. She was his happy place and he needed to picture it now more than ever. The image of her red hair and doe eyes appeared in his head. It started to calm him down and he was able to finally catch a breath. It was as if she was there with him, he could hear her calling his name. On instinct he called back for her, needing to get to her, to save her. His eyes fluttered at the visual and all at once they opened, reminding him that it was only his imagination. As the attack subsided, his now open eyes were now filled with determination.

Grabbing his belongings, he raced out of his office and through the halls to get to the front. He repeatedly pressed the elevator button until it finally arrived at his floor. His breathing had become erratic and he felt like he was no longer in his own body. _He had Donna._ The one thing he fought to protect in this world, was in harm's way because of him once again. How could he let this happen?

The last time she was in trouble, he got her out of it. The charges dropped and everything was okay. But this time it wasn't prison she was facing, it was death. All because he loved to piss people off and Frank Gallo was no exception to that. He couldn't believe it was happening again. She was at risk because of him.

His mind was flooded with emotions as he waited impatiently for the elevator doors to open. All of their memories flashed before his eyes as he stared at his reflection in the elevator doors. He fought back the tears as he felt them forming in his eyes. This was not the time for him to break down, not when she needed him most.

As the elevator doors began to open, he rushed through them before they could fully widen. He had never run faster in his life. Ray had been waiting for him right outside the lobby door. The car seemed as though it was a mile away. Not hesitating for a second, he whipped open the building door and hurried to the car. He opened the car door and sat down as fast as he could.

"Well you're in a hurry to get to miss Agard's tonight," Ray mumbled as he started the car's engine.

The comment smacked him in the face. Paula...his girlfriend. He hadn't even thought about the fact that Gallo might have known he was dating her. How could he be so dumb? She was his girlfriend, not Donna. Why the hell did he not think of that? If he didn't think of Paula, would Gallo not think of her too?

This was a life or death situation. Two people he cared about were in harm's way and the next decision he made could change all of that. Why did he have to make everything so complicated? He was with Paula and yet something was telling him that she was probably fine. Maybe this was what Gallo wanted, for him to have to choose between the two women in his life.

He had no idea what to do, so he called Paula. It went straight to voicemail. "Ray drive as fast as you can to Paula's apartment now."

There was no telling what Gallo knew, but he was fully aware of how much he cared for Donna. What if he was going to the wrong place? His anxiety was starting to eat away at him. Why hadn't either of them answered?

…

Only five minutes had passed, but it felt like an hour to him. He had texted Donna again, but there was still no reply. Maybe she had fallen asleep. They did have a big day coming up. He couldn't even think about the case, when someone's life was on the line. The fact that he didn't know whose, pissed him off even more. His phone buzzed and as he read the name, his heart sank into his chest. "Shit," he yelled. "Stop the car." Ray pulled over per his request.

The last thing he wanted to see on his phone, had appeared. Paula had texted him back, replying that her phone had died, and she had just gotten home. Still unsure of the situation, he wasn't entirely convinced. There was no way to know if it was actually her texting him, so he got out of the car and called her.

"Harvey," she answered.

Relief and guilt all flushed him at once upon hearing her voice, seemingly okay. "You said you're home?"

"Uh yes, I just got home. Is everything alright?" Her confusion was apparent even through the phone.

Harvey was in disbelief and already sprinting back to the car. "I have to go. I'll call you when I can."

He hung up before he could hear her reply. He was infuriated with himself. How could he waste valuable time like that when Donna's life was on the line? He should've trusted his gut, the part of him that told him when Gallo said "everything" he meant Donna. His anger was evident with every step he took. He was back in the car within seconds.

"Is everything okay, Mr. Specter?" Ray questioned as he looked at him through the rearview mirror.

"Go to Donna's now," he demanded, the fear present behind every word fumbling out of his mouth.

Ray nodded in response, aware that Harvey had lost all patience. Something was clearly wrong. He had never been short with Ray, but suddenly nothing else mattered. She was in danger. Because of him. He made the wrong decision once, and it wasn't going to happen again. It took all of him not to get choked up in front of Ray. He wasn't allowed to breakdown, not now. His emotions were all over the place, thinking only of the worst, but she needed him to have faith that everything would be okay. They were Harvey and Donna. Nothing and no one could ever come between them.

He was pissed at himself. How could he make a mistake like that? It wasn't crazy that he thought Gallo would go after his girlfriend, but he should've stuck with his gut. Maybe Gallo knew something that Harvey hadn't come to realize… the person he cared about most in this world was Donna and now Frank Gallo had her.

**I hope you guys liked this chapter. If you did let me know in the reviews! Xx**


	2. All Because of Me

**Hi again. This is a fair warning that this chapter gets extremely intense and does contain graphic content. I hope I did it justice and you all don't hate me after this chapter. It was extremely hard to write but I am so proud of what I've done.**

The fear he felt throughout the car ride to her apartment was unlike any other. This wasn't Coastal Motors or Liberty Rail; this was her life that was hanging by a thread not just her freedom. He couldn't even begin to fathom what a world without her would be like. There was no Harvey Specter without Donna Paulsen, that was a fact. It was too dark and too cruel of a world to live without her light in it.

"Can you drive faster dammit." His emotions continued to fluctuate between rage and sadness. It was unfair of him to take it out on his driver, he wasn't the one holding Donna against her will. He could feel his fists tightening every time Gallo's face popped into his head. He closed his eyes and tried to regulate his breathing, knowing if he acts with his emotions, he will never save her.

"We are a minute away, Mr. Specter," he paused. "I don't mean to pry, but something seems wrong. Is there something I should know about?"

Harvey hadn't even considered letting Ray know what was going on. Hell, he hadn't even informed Mike or Louis about Frank Gallo's whereabouts. All he could think about was her. Thinking about the memories they shared, he feared that would be all he had left of her… memories. He wanted to make so many more with her. She was not allowed to leave him, not now or ever again. He had already lost her once and he was not about to lose her for good.

He hadn't even realized the tear falling down his face until Ray had passed back a tissue for him. "I'm sorry. I don't know…" he trailed off, trying to pull himself together. "It's Donna. Someone I sent away to prison a long time ago has her."

Ray immediately interrupted, "Oh my god. We must call the police," he yelled.

"Ray, we can't do that. No sirens. It was a rule when he called. If he hears the police, he is going to kill her." He could feel himself getting choked up when the last few words left his mouth. _Kill her._ Harvey was in disbelief at his own words. He had gotten them both out of a lot in the past couple of years, but how the hell was he going to get them out of this?

Deep down he knew that if it ever came down to it, he would save her over himself any day. He always said he would take a bullet for her and now he might actually have to.

…

When they turned on her street, his hands instinctively reached for the door. Ray was still coming to a stop as Harvey opened the door to run inside. He had barely even gotten the door shut he was in such a hurry. There was no way of knowing what to expect once he got inside.

Patience was running low and he couldn't wait for the elevator so instead sprinted towards the stairs. His heart rate increased with every step he took. The stairway door flung open as he reached her floor. When he turned into her hallway, the sight brought him to a halt.

Her door was cracked open, the door frame no longer together. It was clear he had forced his way inside her home. He cautiously inched towards his favorite number 206. As he neared the door, he noticed the blood dripping down the entryway, and he let out a small whimper at the sight. He held back all the tears that were being prepared to fall down his face. _It was her blood._

When he entered the apartment, the room was nothing like it used to be. Pictures that were once hanging had fallen to the ground, the glass table was now shattered on the floor, and vases were broken up into pieces all over. It had been nothing like he expected it to be, but he shouldn't be surprised. _Donna fought back._ There were rips in the red paint across the walls, looking like marks from fingernails. The blood had blended in with the paint so well, he barely noticed it spread across. There were droplets of blood as he made his way down the hall. The droplets turned into a small pool that had drag marks on the right side. It was something out of a horror movie.

He attempted to prepare himself for whatever he was about to see when he made his way to the end. Nothing could prepare him for what was going to happen next. As he looked to the right, what he saw made him drop to his knees.

Donna had been tied into one of her dining room chairs, hands and feet both bound. There was no sign of consciousness from her, but her chest was still moving up and down. _She was alive_. Her beautiful white dress was now stained red. The scratches up and down her arms were minor cuts at most, but something was causing all the bleeding.

Gallo was nowhere to be found in the apartment at first glance, so on instinct he scurried his way over to her. "Donna," he whispered as he reached around her feet first to untie her.

No response. As the bottom knot loosened, he made his way up her legs, to stand evenly with her face. He reached his hands around her face to cup it, but when his fingers neared the back of her head, he felt _it._ Blood was oozing out the back. She clearly took a hard blow to the head during her struggle with Frank. "Donna, wake up," he begged. "I'm going to get you out of here."

She began to move around slightly, starting to regain consciousness. "Har…" she attempted to mumble.

"I'm right here," he explained as he lifted her chin carefully. "I'm not going-" His words were cut short by the strike to the back of his head. As he drifted off, he watched the dark figure hover over him.

…

The shooting pain woke him from his slumber. He winced at the agony, the warm feeling in the back of his head becoming unbearable. Someone was calling out his name. A familiar voice accompanied it, but he couldn't quite process whose yet. His hand attempted to reach for the spot that was throbbing but was hindered by the cuffs around his hands.

A dark shadow appeared out of the corner of his eye. "How does it feel to be the prisoner this time?" The man chuckled at his own joke as he wandered over to them.

His whole body froze when he noticed the gun in the man's right hand. His fear intensified as the man got farther away from him and closer to her.

Harvey and Donna were about five feet apart, facing one another. Gallo hadn't given Harvey the luxury of being tied to a chair, so he was cuffed and thrown on the ground. She smiled as his eyes lifted to connect with hers. She was finally awake. That moment between them was all he needed to put forth the little strength he had left. She was all the motivation he needed to fight to stay alive. "Gallo, what the hell?"

"Just wanted to make sure you stayed put and watched as I take away _your everything,_" he shouted as he pointed the gun in Donna's direction. Her eyes tightened shut at the gesture, clearly more afraid than ever. Her makeup was running down her face, mascara dripping down with every tear. The pain of seeing her like that was a thousand times worse than his head injury.

Harvey's eyes shot wide open at the action. He couldn't believe that this was actually happening to them. How the hell did he escape and why did he come here? Frank Gallo could've been halfway across the world by now, but he chose to come back and seek his revenge on him. This was all Harvey's fault. If he would've just helped Gallo when he asked him to, none of this would've happened.

"Why are you doing this?"

He changed the gun's direction to Harvey, charging forward as he started answering the question. "I see the way you two look at each other. She means more to you than anyone else in this world, right? Well guess what I had that too. I had that until you took it from me."

Harvey began to rebut, clearly infuriated by his response. "How did I take it from you? You chose to do what you did."

"Harvey," Donna interjected, the sound of her voice begging him to stop. He wasn't allowed to egg him on, not when he had a gun flying freely between the two of them. This wasn't some trial where he could get away with that without real consequences. This was their lives.

"You sent me away. I had a beautiful woman who was my other half. She was perfect in every way and was way out of my league. But she chose me, and I chose her back. We had it all we did the marriage and babies thing. We had the most stunning baby girl. We were struggling for money so I did what I did, but you couldn't let that happen. Now neither of them will talk to me because you sent me to prison," he charged towards Harvey as he finished the statement. As he arrived in front of him, Gallo jumped forward and kicked him in the stomach with all of his force. Harvey whimpered at the pain feeling as though he was just shot by a canon in his gut.

"Stop it. Leave him alone!" Donna's words were covered in sobs. She could barely catch her breath due to everything going on, her sight impeded by the endless stream of tears. Harvey couldn't bear to watch her like this. If she didn't work for him and care about him and _love him_, none of this would be happening right now.

"You took everything from me," he crouched down to scream in his ears. "Now I'm going to show you what it feels like to lose the one thing that matters most to you in this world." Gallo stood up and turned to face Donna.

His heart sank down into his stomach, all of the air leaving his lungs. He was right, he couldn't lose the one thing that he loved. The only person who has stood by him through all of the good and bad. He loved her but he didn't know how until that moment.

Then, it hit him. The only way he could protect the one he loved, was to hurt her. Harvey looked up at her and mouthed an "I'm sorry" before proceeding with the only thing he could think of that would get her out of this. _Lie_. He watched as her eyes cleared and she nodded.

"Your plan failed then Gallo," he mumbled.

Frank's eyebrows raised at his proclamation. He turned on his heels to face the injured man. "What the hell do you mean I failed? I have everything right here."

He needed to be careful. Frank was a loose cannon getting ready to blow at any moment. The next word he said could set him off.

Harvey pushed himself onto his hands and sat back against the couch. The pain was terrible, but he couldn't lie down in defeat any longer. "You don't have my everything. You clearly didn't do your research while you were locked away. What a shame to waste all that time."

Gallo's face turned red as blood. They could almost see the steam coming out of his ears after Harvey's words. "I have Donna. She is your everything, stop lying."

"I'm not lying. I don't think of her in that way. We work together, yes, but I am seeing someone. It's very serious," he paused. "So serious, in fact, I was going to ask her to marry me. Donna was even helping me pick out rings."

Harvey watched as her mouth fell open shortly, quickly pulling it back up when she realized what she had done. Even though she knew it was a lie, there was even more pain behind her eyes now. The thought of him even pretending to get a ring for someone else, made her sick.

Donna reluctantly spoke. "He is telling the truth. There is absolutely nothing between us. There never was and there never will be," her eyes met his as the words fell from her lips. "We went last week to Tiffany's, but nothing seemed right."

Frank's rage began to show as he shredded through her apartment, kicking over anything and everything in sight. He looked around, pissed off at the world that his plan might be failing. "STOP LYING TO ME, SPECTER. I KNOW YOU ARE GODDAMN LYING," he screamed at the top of his lungs.

"I'm not-"

As soon as Gallo heard the word "not" he stomped over to Donna, and in one quick motion, smacked her across her face with his gun, knocking her out once again.

"You fucking bastard," Harvey yelled, squirming in his place, tears free flowing. "I'm going to end you."

Frank grabbed Donna by her hair to pull her head up so he could see her face. He pointed the gun up at her once again. "Admit that she is the one or I will blow her brains out right now," he demanded.

His heart was being pulled in so many directions in that moment. The pain he felt for Donna, the anger boiling from Gallo's actions, but most importantly the love he felt for her. The passion he felt for her was stronger than anything he had ever felt in his life. He knew exactly how he loved her, but until that second, he couldn't access it. With Donna's life on the line though, he had to.

"Stop. Let her go. You win, you are right," the defeat clear in his voice. "I love her. She is my everything. She's the reason my world keeps spinning. I wake up every morning for her. I get up and go into the office to see her. I crack jokes to watch her laugh. If she was sad, I'd do anything I can to make her happy. I've survived all of these years because of my love for her," he stopped to catch his breath.

Harvey sat there in awe of himself. The same man who couldn't admit how he felt for Donna for twelve years, just poured his soul out to Frank Gallo. If only Donna had been awake to hear him…

"Don't hurt her any more than you already have. I'm sitting here completely destroyed by what I had to witness. You won. You've tortured me. Don't kill her, she didn't put you away… I did. If you want revenge for what happened to you, kill me."

There was no way they were both getting out of this. It had become clear to Harvey the second he heard Gallo's story. If either of them was making it out alive, and Harvey had anything to do with it, it would be her. He would lay his life on the line for her any day. That was what he had to do for the person that he loves.

"How sweet. You are giving yourself up for her. That's very noble of you, I have to admit. That's so unlike the selfish Specter I know." The psychopath was flinging the gun left and right without a care while still holding her head up.

Harvey wanted nothing more than to jump up and beat the shit out of him for being so reckless around her. His anger was building up inside watching him toy with his emotions the way he was. Frank Gallo knew exactly what he was doing now. He had all the leverage in the world to make Harvey do whatever he wanted. This is why he didn't allow himself to feel anything. This is why he had been so closed off from everyone for years. Gallo was absolutely right: caring makes him weak.

But his feelings for Donna are what also made him strong. She is why he kept going and why he was still fighting for her to stay alive. The way she made him feel fueled his entire body to keep protecting her.

The best goddamn closer this city had ever seen, was about to close his final deal.

"I have changed. Everything's changed. I'm not that man anymore. This is between you and me, not her. Who put you away? Me. Who took you away from your wife? Me. Who ripped your child from your arms? Me." Harvey was egging him on. If Donna were awake to see this, she would be infuriated by his recklessness. "It all comes back to me. So, stop being a damn coward and end it already. Get your goddamn revenge on the man who ruined your life."

Gallo was taking Harvey's bait. The man had turned to point the gun back at Harvey for the last time. "You think I'm a coward? I have a fucking gun in my hand. I am getting my goddamn revenge on you. Killing you is a mercy killing. Getting to watch your face as I take the one thing that matters most to you in this world, is all I need. You are sitting on the floor watching as I hold a gun to her head. You are the coward. You wanna see what a real man looks like? I'll fucking show you."

His plan that he thought had been working took a turn for the worst. The gun that was once pointed at him, was now turning back to her direction. She was helpless and she didn't even have a clue as she was still knocked out. No one was saving them, this was it.

The only thing he could think about was that he never got to tell her. The words "I love you" continued on a loop in his head as he watched. His hopes and dreams of once having everything with her, vanished from his mind. All of their almosts were never going to be anything more than that. Their time was coming to an end.

Everything turned into slow motion. His mind and body were no longer connected. It was almost like his panic attack all over again, except this time it was worse. It wasn't an attack; it was real life. He could feel his heart beating out of his chest. His lips parted to scream as he tasted the salty tears that trickled their way into his mouth. Harvey could feel himself screaming for Gallo to stop, but he heard nothing as the entire room went silent.

Silent until he heard the shot.

**I am so sorry for leaving it there. Please don't shoot me in your reviews! Love to you all.**


	3. Faith

**Hello everyone. I'm back again with the third installment. I'm sorry for how I left you all last time, but I hope I wrote this chapter fast enough to make up for it. Enjoy!**

His head, now weighing one hundred pounds of guilt and sorrow, couldn't lift off the floor. He wouldn't allow himself to look. The pain from his loss was too hard to process. Past events still replaying in his head as his eyes remained tightly shut. Their first meeting flashed by in his head as it was followed by their last. His heart had been ripped in half, losing the person who made it whole. His body was aching for her. The floor below him was now a puddle of his own tears. His ears were still ringing from the sound of the gun. There was no sound to be heard besides his cries.

Until the man said it.

"Clear," the officer shouted as the squad moved forward. Harvey lifted his head up at the sound out of confusion. When he saw the scene, he gasped. It wasn't Donna that had been shot… it was Gallo. A wave of relief came over him when he saw Donna still sitting there, still breathing. The waterworks followed shortly after that. But also, a feeling that was common for Harvey Specter soon followed; anger. Gallo was lying in a pool of his own blood, lifeless. While he wished Gallo dead, he wanted him to suffer for what he did to her. Death was the easy way out. That man needed to pay for what he did in misery and pain, but instead he paid with his life.

A paramedic had made her way over to Donna, while the cop who shot Gallo came over to uncuff him. "Are you alright, sir?" The officer broke off the cuffs in a second, releasing Harvey from his restraints.

He hardly even processed the question. "I'm fine. Move out of my way," he stated as he pushed his way through the crowd of saviors and crawled over to Donna. His adrenaline had kicked in as his pain was nonexistent. He worked his way around the paramedic and grabbed a hold of her hand.

"Donna," he whispered as he helped remove the last of her ropes that were keeping her tied down. As the ropes came loose, she fell forward into his arms. He cradled her, brushing the hair off her face to reveal the bruises. The sight nearly caused his heart to stop. He had become numb to all of the emotional pain, not even noticing the tears anymore. She squirmed slightly in his arms, awakening barely. Her movement caused a small jolt of relief to enter his body.

"Sir, you need to let me check on her. There could be internal bleeding," the paramedic explained.

"I'm so sorry," he cried out, but he wasn't talking to the paramedic. "This is all my fault. Everything that happened, it was my goddamn fault," he choked up as the words fell from his mouth.

The paramedic placed a hand on his shoulder. "None of this is your fault. It's the psychopath's fault. He did this to her, not you."

"If I didn't need her, if I didn't love her, he wouldn't have done this to her. She was hurt for caring about me. For choosing me. For putting me first," he looked down at her fluttering eyes that were attempting to open. "Sorry will never be enough to fix this."

"You can fix it, but you have to let me help her," the aide exclaimed, reaching out her hands.

Harvey nodded his head in a panic. "I can't let her go again. You have to save her." He gave the paramedic the look of approval and they had a gurney in the room within seconds.

He sat back and watched as they worked on her, never letting go of her hand. They had her carefully moved onto the platform within seconds.

"We need to get her to the hospital immediately and get a head CT. She might have a cerebral hemorrhage from the blunt force trauma to her head," the woman yelled out.

His head was spinning from everything happening. It was all happening so fast. The room was flooded with people checking her eyes and her head. "What the hell does that mean?"

No one was answering his questions. He was completely in the dark about everything relating to her injuries.

"You have to stay back and let us do our jobs," the officer proclaimed as he held out his arm. The gurney started to roll away and his hand lost hers.

"Stop!" He was yelling at the medics. "Please, wait." He shoved the officer off of him that was holding him back and ran over to her.

"Sir, we have to get her to the hospital."

His hand reached back out for hers. "I know. I just…" he trailed off and turned to face her. His head tilted as he looked down at her, grazing her forehead with his hand. He bent over to allowing his forehead to touch hers. He leaned up and placed a kiss on her check.

"You are not allowed to die on me, Paulsen. I love you," he whispered. The paramedics had disappeared from his mind. The only ones in the room were the two of them. This was their moment and no one else would share it with them. "I am so madly in love with you and if you die, I die. I can't be me without you. So, you have to be okay because I can't lose you. Not now or ever. You are the strongest woman I know, so you fight like hell to come back to me."

Suddenly he was brought back to reality as the paramedics grabbed his arm. "We have to go now. The police are going to need a statement from you, so you'll need to stay-"

"I'm coming with you," he paused. As he saw the paramedic start to open her mouth, he jumped in. "This is not up for discussion. She is my family," the last word lingering on his lips. She was his family, the most important person in his life. He wished he could tell her that.

The woman stopped and nodded, leading the way out of the apartment. The rushed their way to the elevator, every second mattered. His patience was running low waiting for it to arrive at the bottom floor. As they rushed out of the building, Ray had been standing outside waiting for their arrival.

"Mr. Specter! Thank god you two are okay. I'm sorry for not listening to you, but I had to call them. I explained everything to them and they said-"

Harvey was in shock. They were alive thanks to his driver. He was now forever in his debt. "Ray, thank you. You saved us," he explained still holding onto her hand as they walked side by side. "The only reason she is alive is because you didn't listen to me. I don't know how I'll ever repay you, but right now we have to get to the hospital." He reached out his hand and shook Ray's when they arrived at the ambulance. As their hands met, Harvey surprisingly pulled him in for a hug. A handshake was not enough for the man who just saved Donna's life.

Ray backed away and watched as Harvey entered the vehicle. "I will meet you at the hospital, Mr. Specter."

The ambulance door shut, and Harvey waved good-bye. The vehicle rushed into the night.

Luckily, Donna's apartment was only a five-minute ride away from the hospital. He never let go of her hand the whole ride there. He watched as she laid there, helpless but fighting. She was not allowing Gallo to get the best of her. They had come too far to let anyone come between them now.

As they arrived at the hospital, she was rushed out of the vehicle. Everything happened so fast. They were pushing her into the building faster than he could keep up. And yet, he kept hold of her hand through it all. Once they were down the hall, he noticed the sign up ahead. _Authorized personnel only beyond this point. _He knew it was coming, the moment that they had to part, but he still held on until the very last second.

The nurse on his side of the bed stopped to face him. She held out her hands in front of herself to stop him. "You can't come with us, I'm sorry. You will have to sit in the waiting area. Is there anyone you can call?"

He watched as they continued to roll her farther and farther away from him. His heart dropped when they turned the corner and she was gone. "I… I have people to call. Where is there a phone I can use?"

The nurse placed her hand on his shoulder in a comforting manner. She pointed to the desk behind him. "Right over there. I will come back to find you when I have an update on her."

"Donna… her name is Donna," he mumbled back.

A look of sympathy came over her face after hearing his words. "I will come back when I have an update on _Donna,_" she smiled as she turned to run towards the doors.

…

Mike and Rachel arrived first, followed shortly after by Louis. They were all wrecks, especially Rachel. Mike was quick to comfort her as they all waited to hear back from the doctor. They all gave their apologies and asked what happened, but Harvey was mute. He had been curled up in a ball on the floor the entire time. Mike and Rachel sat in chairs next to him and Louis across from them. Harvey had barely spoken a word to any of them since they had gotten there. The only person he wanted comfort from, couldn't give it to him.

None of them knew exactly what happened as they were still waiting for him to process it himself. Harvey still couldn't believe where they were. He was definitely in shock that this was real life, that he was waiting to find out whether or not Donna was dead or alive. She was fighting for her life as they all sat around and did nothing to help.

He disliked being in the hospital. Everything from the smell to the lights irritated him. Mostly, he just hated feeling useless. He was no longer in pain from his injuries, but in pain from waiting. It was excruciating not knowing what was going on with her. They knew everything about each other and yet he had not a clue what was going on with her.

Some time had passed by, but there still hadn't been any updates from anyone. Everyone was getting impatient waiting to hear something. The whole room was consumed with fear and worry. No one knew what was going to happen next, some of them still didn't even know what happened to begin with.

"Harvey, when are you going to tell us what happened?" Louis questioned. Harvey noticed Louis was becoming impatient as his leg was bouncing up and down repeatedly. This added to Harvey's rage.

"You don't wanna know," he answered back, lifting his head up to the sky after the fact.

Louis was stunned by the response he received. "Yeah, I do want to know. Donna is lying in a hospital bed somewhere in this god forsaken place having who knows what done to her and you can't tell us how she got here?"

And that was it. Harvey Specter had officially lost it.

"She got the crap beat out of her by Frank fucking Gallo, Louis. Do you wanna hear about how I had to sit across from her and watch as he smacked her and hurt her and threatened her? How he hit her so hard that she became unconscious not once, but twice?" Louis's face had turned green at the remarks. Harvey had now sprung to his feet in a rage. The volume of his voice increased with his anger. "Do you wanna hear about the look on her face when he pointed the gun to her head the first time or, the third time?"

"Harvey that's enough. Stop it, you need to calm down," Mike explained as he placed a hand on his shoulder.

"I-" And in an instant, Harvey Specter went from the angriest man in the room, to the saddest. Collapsing onto his knees, he let out a loud wail. "I'm supposed to protect her. Nothing bad is ever supposed to happen to her and I let it happen. Gallo went after her because of me and now she's in the hospital." He started to choke on his own sobs. His cries echoed throughout the hospital wing as Mike bent down to comfort him. Louis watched as the person he once knew as the "coldest", showed every color of emotions.

"I love her. I'm an idiot because I knew I loved her, maybe even from the first time I met her, and I didn't tell her. I buried it and dated other people. I lied to myself for years and now when I can finally access my feelings, she might not ever hear them," he let out a loud sigh as he finished his profession.

"Harvey?" The last voice he thought he'd hear lingered behind him. _Paula_. When he turned to see her face, he could tell she had heard every last word of his confession. "I heard what happened and I rushed over to make sure you both were okay."

He was quickly brought back down to reality with her surprise visit. "Paula, I'm so-"

"You don't have to say it. You've said it all." She looked down at the floor in defeat and embarrassment. "I have some of your things at my apartment, I can send them over later this week."

Harvey got up and walked over to her. He reached out his hand, but she backed away from him. "I really am sorry, Paula. It's her and it always will be her. I have to stop lying to the person I love."

"I should have known better. I knew the way you felt, but I still pursued you anyways," she shook her head in disappointment. There was silence for a moment as their eyes met briefly. "I hope she pulls through. Good-bye Harvey," she smiled as she turned to walk away.

He turned to face the rest of the group who had quickly turned away from his direction, acting as if they hadn't listened to the whole thing. Rachel's eyes met his, but she was surprised to find them filled with relief. "Are you okay?" She asked him.

"I'll be okay when a doctor comes out here and tells me that she is," he countered back. "If she's not okay-"

Rachel hurried over to him, interrupting him before he could complete his sentence. "She will be okay. You just have to have faith in her, like she has faith in you."

Her words made him tear up again. He was riding on a rollercoaster of emotions. Anything that reminded him of her suddenly became a trigger for tears. He missed her. All he wanted was to hear one of her quick-witted jokes or look at her beautiful smile. There was a need just to be near her, to watch her and know she was okay.

"I can't lose her, Rachel. You saw what it did to me when she left to work for Louis. I can't lose her for good," he whimpered.

She placed a hand on his back and escorted him to sit down. "Donna Paulsen is one of the strongest people I know. She is an absolute firecracker. I also know that she would never leave you behind. As long as you're still out here pulling for her, she's going to come through. She's Donna, she always does."

Harvey wiped away his own tears with his jacket sleeve. "Do you think I'm too late to tell her?"

"We've all known for years how in love with each other you two are. Deep down, I'm sure she always knew too just like you did. You are Harvey and Donna; your hearts beat for each other. You are two halves of a whole. So no, I don't think you're too late," she gently rubbed his back as she watched the tears dry from his eyes.

He loved Donna Paulsen and the second she was okay; he was going to tell her that. All he could do now was pray that everything would work out.

His thoughts were cut short when the doctor appeared in the room. Everyone, including Harvey, rose to their feet. He rushed forward to meet the man.

"I'm Doctor Barns. Are you all waiting to hear about a Miss Paulsen?"

Harvey's eyes widened. "Yes, how is she?"

"We are taking her up for surgery now. When we got her CT back, we saw that she has a severe cerebral hemorrhage causing a massive hematoma from her injuries, which means her brain is bleeding. The bleed is causing swelling in her brain and we need to gain control immediately," the doctor looked around as he finished. Everyone's faces were filled with fear.

"What are the risks?" Harvey asked.

"If she doesn't have this surgery, she will die." The words hit everyone like a train. "I will send someone out here to update you all as much as possible throughout the procedure, but I have to go now." He spun around to head back to the surgical room, but he suddenly stopped.

The doctor began to speak. "Oh, I almost forgot. Which one of you is Harvey Specter?"

"I am," he responded, curious as to how he knew his name.

The doctor wandered over to him. "Miss Paulsen was awake for a very brief moment when we were running the scans. She asked if you were alright before she passed out again. I thought you would want to know that she's thinking of you." He started to back away. "Your girlfriend really loves you." As the words left his mouth, he had already begun jogging away.

Harvey turned to face everyone else. They were all clearly waiting to see his reaction. His face was a mix of shock and sorrow as the word echoed in his mind. _Girlfriend_.

Would he ever get the chance to call her that?

**Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. I've knocking them out pretty quickly now, so I'm sure the fourth chapter will be up soon. As always, please leave your reviews and let me know what you think!**


	4. Motionless

**Hi guys. I'm sorry this chapter took a lot longer than expected but sometimes life happens. Anyways, this chapter is one of the longest yet and definitely the toughest to write. (Don't worry... yet) Kidding! Enjoy this chapter!**

Chapter 4

Time had frozen for Harvey Specter. Not a single part of him had moved since the doctor paid the group a visit to tell them about her current surgery. His mind was numb causing him to relapse into his past state of darkness, of assuming the worst. They weren't sure if it was the shock from the past events or the pain from his apparent wounds, but the curled-up ball on the floor in the corner that was Harvey Specter, was not going anywhere anytime soon. Not until he heard the words, he most needed to. _She is okay. The surgery was a success. _There was no way of him being Harvey without that knowledge. If it wasn't obvious before, it was now. There was no Harvey Specter without Donna Paulsen.

The waiting was what was eating away at him. Not knowing, not being with her would be the death of him. Every second that passed felt like a century had gone by. He couldn't eat or sleep or breathe without knowing that she was alright. No one had come out with any updates in hours. The silence was his number one enemy. He knew from his career that when a client was quiet, there was something wrong. The hospital was mute. Of course, his brain immediately went to the worst scenario every time the doors opened, and Doctor Barns wasn't the one entering.

He was no longer aware of the people surrounding him, being tucked away in the corner. He physically couldn't acknowledge Mike or Rachel when they offered him coffee or water. The sandwich she brought him had been sitting in front of him for god knows how long. He had lost track of time. He tried to convince himself that the longer it took the better her chances, but he knew how serious this surgery was. He assumed if they hadn't come out yet that at least they were still working which meant, _she was alive._ That sliver of hope was all he needed to keep going, but he was still a mess. No one could clean him up except for her. But no matter how much he needed her, she needed him even more. She needed him to be strong for her and to believe that Donna would make it back to him.

She had to. There were too many words left unsaid, too many actions that he regretted, too many opportunities that he had missed. Everything that happened to her had finally snapped him back into his body, causing him to realize his true feelings. He was so insanely in love with her. And now he might lose her.

He was furious with himself for so many things, for waiting, for letting this all happen, for allowing her to believe for so long they would never be anything more. The truth was, he wanted everything with her. Why did it have to take something like this to make him come to terms with that?

He had known from the moment he met her that they were destined to be together. Timing was always their problem. When she first walked up to him in that bar, the only thing he thought about was sex. Back then, he wasn't the man he was today. He was nowhere near ready for everything Donna had to offer and all that they could be together. However, the man from that bar was no longer around, he had done so much growing up over the years. All of that because of her. She was the reason he wanted to be a better man. Donna challenged him, fought for him, believed in him, when no one else did. If he called at six in the morning or twelve at night when he needed someone, she would always answer. No matter the baggage or the flaws that he had, she not only accepted them all, but she loved him anyways.

She was his person, and whether he knew it or not, he was hers as well. All he needed was for her to make it through this so he could finally tell her that.

…

Three different doctors had come through the doors within the past couple of hours, but none of them had been Doctor Barns. It was incredibly strange to him that he had no idea what the first name was of the man who was currently working to save Donna's life. A complete stranger held her life in the palm of his hands and he couldn't do anything to help.

With every doctor that came out to give news to waiting families, his patience grew thinner and thinner. He watched as relief flashed over some families faces while others lost their whole worlds. The idea of either of those scenarios occurring for him drove him mad. The frustration mixed with his lack of sleep was not the kind of mindset they all needed Harvey to be in. There was no telling what kind of reaction Harvey would have next.

Once the eight-hour mark hit, Mike figured he should try and at least talk to Harvey. Maybe not about what happened to her, but anything to take his mind out of the gutter. He found a spot on the ground next to his mentor and relaxed back against the wall. "Band or DJ?"

Harvey's eyes finally allowed themselves to blink at the question, causing him to come back to reality. "What?"

"Earlier today, Donna had asked me the same thing. She was helping Rachel with some of the planning for the wedding and I couldn't decide. I couldn't figure out what was stopping me from answering such a simple question."

The ball of Harvey Specter had begun to open up, allowing his body to turn ever so slightly to face his protégé. He was confused why his friend was telling him about this. Then he couldn't get the question out of his mind. What would he want at his wedding?

"Then I realized it wasn't about what I wanted, but what Rachel wanted. I couldn't decide what she would like better," Mike whispered as he watched his future wife send him a loving look.

"Donna would want a band," he mumbled as he looked down at the floor. Even when the conversation wasn't about her, he somehow managed to bring her up. "She loves to sing even if she's off tune sometimes, but she would definitely get up there and sing along with all of them. I would just sit at the table and watch her in awe. I would be her biggest fan out there." He smiled as he let out a slight chuckle. The image of her rocking out with the guitarist had popped into his head.

A soft smile appeared on Mike's face as he listened to his friend talk about the woman he loved. "I can't believe I'm listening to Harvey Specter talking about his love for Donna Paulsen."

"I can't believe I'm finally able to say it out loud," he laughed. "When I first got Gallo's call I listened as he told me that he would take away the one person who I cared about most in this world. Out of the clear blue sky, it hit me that Donna was that person. She was the only person I could think about in that moment."

Mike interrupted, "Hey what am I? Chopped liver?"

They both let out a loud chuckle that shook their entire bodies. Harvey didn't think he could laugh like that anymore. "I'm sorry to disappoint you, but Donna's the one. She is the most important person in my life, and I want her to know it. And I think the only thing worse than Donna being where she is right now, is the fact that I can't tell her that."

Mike placed a hand on his back as he comforted his friend. "You will get to tell her soon. Have a little faith."

For the fourth time that evening, the doors opened. This time to reveal the only doctor Harvey wanted to see. All of the feelings flooded his entire being as he quickly rose to his feet to meet the doctor halfway. He wished he had Donna's ability to read people in that moment. The doctor's-tired face didn't give him a sign of whether she was okay or not. The worry began to set as he approached the exhausted man. What would he do if the next words that came out of his mouth were the words ones he would ever hear?

The group had huddled around the doctor who swallowed before he began to speak. "She's out of surgery." They hadn't moved, still intently listening to the doctor's every word. "Donna made it through, but she is still in critical condition. The next twenty-four hours will be important."

The words critical condition lingered around in Harvey's mind. She had survived the surgery, but would she survive the night?

"We are going to watch her closely and there will be nurses posted outside her room at all times."

Harvey finally finding the words, immediately jumped in. "When can we see her?"

Doctor Barns let out a loud sigh before responding. "She's in the ICU right now still not awake, but I can only let one person in to see her at a time right now as it is well past visiting hours."

Harvey's eyes widened as the words set in. He knew he needed to see her and as he looked around at the rest of the group, he knew no one would object to him going first. "Can you take me to her please?"

The doctor nodded and gestured for Harvey to follow as he turned to walk away. Relief washed over him as he followed the doctor's lead. Feeling himself getting closer and closer to her had brought back some of the light he had been missing. His body was aching to see her, to hold her, to know that she was alright. He feared that the sight he was about to say when they turned the corner to her room was going to destroy him. The thought of her lying in the hospital bed, helpless and fighting for her life, made his knees buckle as he walked. When they finally stopped in front of her door, he closed his eyes to prepare himself for what he was about to witness.

His eyes opened as he heard the door do the same. He gasped when his eyes found her. His feet began to move his body closer to her. When he reached the bedside, he allowed his hand to graze her cold cheek. He noticed some of her auburn locks peeking through the bandage surrounding her head. He twirled the end of one between his fingers, feeling the softness of her hair once again. Words had been coming from Doctor Barns, but he was so mesmerized by her that he hadn't even heard. The doctor had disappeared from the room, closing the door behind him.

Harvey had turned around to thank him, but instead was met with the empty room. Instead, he grabbed the chair behind him and pulled it close to her. He sat back in the not so comfortable hospital chair and took hold of her hand as he watched her sleep. Their fingers had intertwined like they had many times before. The memory of the most recent time replaying in his head. "You know I wanted to tell you that night, when Jessica had told us she was stepping down. You were there for me when no one else was. You're the only person who knows me better than I know myself." He pulled her hand up to his mouth and placed a soft kiss on the cold back of her hand. "I have been loving you for so long. All of these moments over the years between us just kept fueling that fire that was already burning."

Her chest lifted and fell in the rhythm it had been since he had walked in. He watched her for a moment as if he was waiting for a response, expecting her to open her eyes at such an important remark. But still, she remained unconscious, not hearing a word he was saying, but that wasn't stopping him.

"I not only want you, but I need you. If you thought Louis was a mess, you should see me right now," he paused looking up to see if she would heed his words. "I'm not going anywhere, Donna. You are everything I never knew I wanted. I can't live without you. I already made the mistake of letting you go once and not giving us a chance before, and I won't do that again."

He leaned forward, resting his head on her body, as the tears started to form. He wasn't sure why, but a sudden wave of emotion had come back to hit him. Maybe it was just from the sight before him or the realization that he was talking to himself at the moment, but something had struck a chord. He missed her. There was a need to feel her warmth consume the room like it always did. All he was longing for was to hear her voice again, for her to reply back to him with some quick-witted comment like she always did. Instead, he was met with the sound of his cries in the silent room. The tiredness from the whole ordeal had started to overcome him. As his sobs slowly subsided, he felt himself drifting off, finally finding some peace.

…

The sound of feet shuffling around woke him from his slumber. The morning light hit his eyes as he lifted his head up from the side of the bed. The stiffness in his neck indicating that he had passed out at her side for a long time. As his vision finally cleared up, he noticed the nurse across the way, checking on Donna.

"Is everything alright?" He asked with his hoarse voice.

The nurse was startled by the sound of him. "I'm so sorry I woke you. I just needed to check on Miss Paulsen's vitals, but she's perfectly fine."

Reaching his arms out, he twisted his body to stretch out the tight muscles that had cramped from sleeping in such an uncomfortable chair. He didn't mind getting to wake up next to her, even though it wasn't exactly the way he pictured it. The morning light glistened on her freckle-covered skin. She was starting to get some color back into her. The woman lying before him was finally looking more and more like the Donna he knew and loved. As the nurse moved to head out of the room, he noticed a familiar black bag propped up in the corner. "Whose bag is that?"

The nurse stopped in place and turned around to face him. "One of your friends dropped it off this morning now that it's visiting hours. He said it had some of your clothing in it from home and that he would be back soon."

Harvey nodded and smiled at the nurse as she continued her way out of the room. Immediately he knew this was Mike and Rachel's doing. And by Mike and Rachel, he really meant Rachel. It was a kind gesture reminding him that they also deserved their time with her while they all waited for her to wake. It wasn't just him who was worried about her. Grabbing his bag on his way over, he quickly entered the bathroom to change.

He hadn't even realized he had been in his suit all night. The suit covered in her blood. As he looked in the mirror, he hadn't even recognized the man standing before him. His favorite white shirt was now painted red. Reaching down to unbutton his cuffs, he noticed the H in his initials was darkened by the same stain. He continued with the rest of the process of undressing while keeping his eyes tightened shut the rest of the time. Once he got the clean joggers and black sweater on, he was able to look at himself again, starting to recognize the person looking back at him again. His moment of clarity was cut short by a quiet knock on the door.

"Everything okay in there?" Rachel's familiar voice echoed throughout the bathroom. It was nice to hear a friendly voice coming from the other side of the door.

He opened the entry, coming face to face with his friend. "I'm okay. Thank you for bringing these for me," he explained holding up the black duffle in his hand.

"How'd you know it was me?" Her brows lifting as she asked the question.

"Lucky guess." He dropped the bag back off in the corner and looked back around, noticing they were both now staring at Donna as she continued in her peaceful state. "Are Mike and Louis still out there?"

She nodded, not taking her eyes off of her friend. He could tell this was the first time she had been in the room with her since everything happened. Knowing how much he needed time with Donna, he knew her best friend would need the same.

"I'm going to go out there and find them. You should stay here and watch her," he smiled as he started strolling towards the door. He paused in the doorway. "Talk to her. I like to believe she can hear us." Walking backwards, he continued watching them both as he exited the room.

It was strange for her when he left the room, she felt so alone. Yes, Donna was there but she really wasn't. Her friend was not the same perky, kind woman but a still motionless figure. It hurt that she couldn't hear about how her morning went or what ridiculous thing Harvey had her doing. She was her best friend, the person she confided in when she needed advice and yet there was no guidance coming from Donna. Instead, Rachel was speaking to her friend uninterrupted.

"You know normally we would talk about the things Louis had said that day, but the real gossip is what Harvey is saying," she joked as she watched her friend lacking a reaction. "The man who convinced himself that caring made a person weak, finally admitted the truth. For years, we've all seen it, but I never thought the day you couldn't hear him say it, he would," she paused allowing herself to catch her breath. "Harvey Specter is in love with Donna Paulsen. He might run out of ways to tell you how much he loves you if he keeps saying it this much."

Rachel was hoping that maybe if she waited long enough, her words would cause Donna to finally come back to them. It wasn't fair that this was happening to her. Her best friend was one of the kindest people she had ever known. No matter what was going on in her life she always made time for her. There was never any take with Donna but only giving.

"Not only does he need you back, but I do too. There's no Michelle Ross without Harriet Specter." Reaching out, she grabbed a hold of her friend's hand. As she continued to watch her friend unmoving, the noise behind her startled her. The nurse had come back into the room.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but we need to run a few tests on Miss Paulsen," the nurse whispered as she moved closer to the pair. Rachel stood up and reluctantly let go of Donna's hand, walking out of the room.

…

Harvey had been waiting for Donna when they brought her back from her tests. He was hoping by some off chance, the tests had caused her to wake up. Though, he was not surprised when they brought her back in the same state, the disappointment was still there. He craved to look into her beautiful eyes and list off everything that he loved about her. To finally admit to her the way, he knew he had been feeling for years.

As the nurse dropped her off, he resumed his previous position at her bedside, hand in hand with her. There was a need to be close to her, to know that she was safe in his arms once again. After everything that had happened, he would never let her go again. He couldn't wait to be there for her, to care for her the way he wanted to. The recovery process would be that much easier because he would hold her hand through the entirety of it. He would be at her beck and call, prepared to help her however she needed.

That was what a person should do for the woman they love. And god did he love her.

He sat back watching her, trying to figure out what he wanted to say. There were no more leaving things unsaid for Harvey Specter. As he started to open his mouth, the sound came to a halt. The tight flinch in his hand nearly caused his heart to stop. Her hand had moved and as he looked up to search for her hazel eyes, he finally found them. Overwhelmed by happiness the tears began to fall. The sudden happiness caused him to leap up from his chair. "Donna," he cried out, cupping her face with his left hand.

Moving slower than ever, she allowed her eyes to adjust to the light. Her mind was clearly at work trying to adapt to her new location, when her eyes landed on him. The smile he thought she would give him, never appeared. Rather, a look of confusion swept over her face as she swallowed and carefully opened her mouth. "Who are you?"

**I'm sorry:( I know a lot of you will probably be disappointed with the ending but this is the way the story needed to go. I promise it will get better. With that being said, I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and if you did don't forget to leave your review! All of the feedback has truly warmed my heart and I genuinely appreciate you all, not only taking the time to read this fic, but taking the time to comment as well! Xx**


	5. Waiting Game

**Hi guys. I'm sorry this chapter took as long as it did. Lots of unexpected things came up, but what's important is that the new chapter is here now. I hope you guys all enjoy!**

The words had struck his heart. _Who are you? _The woman lying before him, the person who he loved didn't know who he was. Above all else, he wanted her to be okay and she was. But how was he supposed to be okay when the person he cared about most in this world didn't know him? Those three words set in his panic. It was almost like he was losing her all over again. Yes, she was still alive, but she wasn't herself. The person he had come to love and cherish was seemingly gone. All of their memories wiped from her mind. All of their moments that they have shared over the years were long gone. They would have to start all over, if she would even let him. He couldn't go through all of that pain again. "Donna, it's me," he whispered, practically begging for her to remember with his words.

Even more confusion flashed over her face. She shook her head and began to speak once more. "No, it can't be." There was a hesitation in her voice when she spoke. Looking side to side, she continued on. "See, the Harvey Specter I know doesn't cry. What happened to 'caring makes you weak'?"

It took him a moment to understand her words. She said _his name. _The relief finally settled in as he realized that she had remembered him. Their memories were revived with her, their moments gaining back their importance. Gallo hadn't taken anything from them. He was still Harvey, and she was still Donna.

"What did you just say to me?" he questioned, still unsure that this was real, that he wasn't dreaming.

She lifted her hand to her head, feeling the bandage securing her. "I probably should've just said hi, huh?"

The laughs from inside couldn't be contained as he let out a soft chuckle, shaking his head at the woman before him. There was a mixture of tears and laughter coming from the man before her. They were good tears, however. Harvey Specter was exuding happiness. He allowed himself to sit down on the side of her bed, allowing his hand to find its place on her leg. "It wasn't the best time for a joke," he explained. "I wouldn't expect anything else from you, Paulsen. It's been a long couple of hours without your witty banter."

The smile that had grown on her face was out of her control now. He always knew exactly what to say to her. It was just what she wanted to hear after everything that had happened. She could sense that he missed her, whether he would admit it or not. That was all the comfort she needed at that moment. "I didn't think I would see you again," she confessed, tears welling in her eyes. "How did we get here?"

It was the only question he wished he didn't have to answer. While he knew he had to tell her, he wasn't sure if he was ready to handle that pain again. All the events from that night had flashed before his eyes once more.

When he looked at Donna laying there in her hospital bed, he was brought back to when she was curled in his arms, barely hanging on for dear life, the same moment when he wasn't sure if it was his tears or her blood that was soaking through his shirt. He had convinced himself that that was the last time he would ever hold the woman he loved in his arms. Along with the memory of her heartbeat getting fainter and fainter as he could do nothing but watch his soulmate leave him forever. If she died, so did he.

"Harvey, where did you go?" She asked, interrupting his deep thoughts and bringing him back to their reality. His eyes were telling her that wherever he just drifted off to, was not a good place.

"I'm sorry, I… uh," Harvey mumbled as he was clearly too overwhelmed with the emotions of the memories. "How much do you remember?"

Taking a large gulp, she began to speak. "It all happened so fast. I was waiting on my food when I saw the news about Gallo's escape. I didn't think much of it, let alone that he would be at my door within the next few minutes." She was clearly getting upset thinking about whatever she was about to say next. Harvey brushed his hand up her leg and found her hand once more. The action causing more tears to take over her eyes.

"I heard the knock at the door, and I assumed it was the delivery guy, so I went to grab the cash off my dresser. By the time I was near the door, he had already kicked it open. I think a piece of the door frame might've hit me in the face. And then he… charged at me," she choked on her own words. Harvey clenched his jaw in an attempt to fight back his own tears.

"Donna, you don't have to-"

"I fought back, Harvey. I used whatever I could to fight him off. My heels, the picture hanging, but he was stronger than me. The last thing I remember before him knocking me out was being thrown against the wall." She could barely get those last few words out. The pain behind her eyes was so evident when she spoke of what happened, but Harvey couldn't help but admire how strong she had been throughout it all.

"If he wasn't dead already, I'd go and kill him myself right now," Harvey explained, passing the sad stage and heading straight to rage.

"I'm glad you are here, Harvey." Using as much energy as she could get, she reached out and rested her hand on his.

Her touch was all he needed to calm his nerves. His entire body was able to cool down from the sudden rage he had just felt. "When I walked into your apartment, it was a horror scene, but I was reminded by the setting that you were a fighter. You can get through anything and that was what kept me going," he trailed off. What he was about to say next, was clearly making him nervous. He started to stumble, "Uh, soooo do you remember…"

"Remember what?" She asked, intrigued by the difficulty he was having with forming his question. Before he was able to continue, the doctor walked in.

Doctor Barns was shocked at the sight before him. "Miss Paulsen! I'm Doctor Barns, your surgeon. I'm so glad to see you are awake. How are you feeling?"

Donna attempted to sit up to speak to the man but winced from the pain as she settled back down. "I've been better. I do have a raging headache and some soreness throughout my body."

The doctor flipped through her chart while he listened. "I'll have one of the nurses give you something for the pain, but what you're feeling is totally normal considering you just had brain surgery so there's nothing to worry about."

Harvey looked at Donna in relief. She was finally _okay_, whatever that meant now. "When can I take her home?" Harvey inquired, sending a soft smile back to her as he gave her hand a light squeeze. Donna looked puzzled at the way he had asked his question. He wanted to take _her _home.

She wasn't entirely sure what it was, but she knew something had changed. His whole demeanor was completely altered. They had a flirty, playful banter going for years, but the way he had just looked at her was so tender and loving. Maybe he was finally ready for her and to admit everything that almost everyone on this Earth had realized except for him; Donna Paulsen was the most important person in Harvey's life and he finally knew it.

"Well, we will have to monitor her for the next couple of days to know when. Some patients are good to go home after a week, but each case is different," the doctor explained, looking back at Donna as he finished.

Harvey reached over her bed, extending his hand to the doctor. "Thank you… for everything." Donna's heart skipped a beat watching the exchange. The sincerity in his voice nearly melted her. Relief had now washed over him and quickly turned to happiness.

Trying to process all of his emotions, she got lost somewhere deep in thought. If she didn't know any better, she would've thought that maybe he did love her. Their lines had always been blurry, but she didn't want to kid herself. Him and Paula were together. There was no Donna and Harvey, but then she is brought back to her apartment. Gallo's words echoed in her head. _The thing that matters most._ Frank had thought that she was the most important person in his life. How could she be when they didn't even have everything?

"Donna," Harvey questioned. "Everything okay?"

She was brought back to reality at the sound of his voice. "Yeah sorry. What were you saying?"

Confusion appeared on his face after hearing her question. "I didn't say anything the doctor just said goodbye."

"You're an idiot," she giggled. "I meant before we were interrupted by him, silly."

Once again, the man she thought she knew became a completely different person. She could tell that he was hoping she had forgotten. It was just like the old Harvey. His nervousness overcame him as she watched the confident Harvey Specter disappear. What was it that was eating him alive? They could always talk about anything and now he couldn't even mumble a word to her.

His mouth fell open, but the sound that was supposed to be coming out of it was lacking. Words were not forming for Harvey Specter. He was so incredibly frustrated. Everything he wanted to say to her was all there, but for some reason when he looked into her deep brown eyes something stopped him. He finally knew how he loved her and yet he couldn't tell her. It wasn't that he didn't want to, but his body wouldn't let him. Why was everything so complicated when it came to them?

"Oh, my goodness! You really are awake!" Rachel screeched as she ran into the room, with Mike and Louis following right behind her. Donna reluctantly broke eye contact with Harvey and looked over at her friends. They all ran over to her bedside to give her hugs. "I'm so happy-" her friend choked. Rachel's emotions had started to take over as the tears left her eyes.

Donna was surprised and moved by her friend's outburst. "Aw Rach, I'm okay. Don't cry please."

Louis quickly jumped in front of them all and smothered her with love. "You're alive."

The laughs echoed through the room. "Yes, Louis I am. I'm really okay guys."

The bruises on her face told them otherwise, but they went along with it anyways. She didn't look like herself anymore. While her energy still made her Donna, she was unrecognizable. She was paler than ever, if that was even possible. All of her warmth had left her body. None of them had ever seen someone with so many cuts on their arms before that moment. It was incredibly painful for them to see all of those terrible reminders of what had happened to her and how none of them were there to stop it.

"What do you need from us?" Mike finally spoke. She could tell by his tone that he was barely keeping all of his emotions in check.

"This is all I could ever need. You guys being here is everything," she smiled, still trying to convince everyone of her "I'm okay" motto. Her eyes glazed over the room, noticing she was convincing no one. It frustrated her that her superpowers were of no help in that moment.

The silence in the room was deafening. No one knew what to say next. What were they supposed to say? There was nothing that would make anything that had happened okay. No words could ever comfort her or change what happened. Donna becoming irritated by the silence finally broke it. "Did you guys make all your final decisions for the wedding?"

Mike shook his head in disbelief that their wedding was still her priority when she was lying in a hospital bed. "We ended up going with the band."

"That's exactly what I would've picked," she explained, a smile gracing her face at the thought of dancing to the band's music in the future. Or better yet, dancing _with Harvey _to the band's melodies.

She always told everyone that he was the best dancer she knew, everyone except him, of course. There was no need to make his head any bigger than it already was. Even if she never told him, he always knew. She would follow his lead anytime he offered his hand. They made quite the duo on the dance floor. It was always natural with them.

The nurse abruptly interrupted the group's reunion. "I'm sorry, everyone. Miss Paulsen needs her rest now and I'm going to be giving her a steroid that will most likely knock her out for the next couple of hours."

Donna swallowed at the nurse's word choice. The woman was unaware of what she had just said, but she couldn't have realized. And then it happened. The memories flashed over her as she tightened her eyes shut. All of a sudden, she was back in that room again with Gallo. It was like it was happening all over again. The frustration she felt trying to release herself from her restraints, the throbbing pain coming from the back of her head, and even the smell of her blood that had stained her dress. It was all so real. She could see Gallo charging towards her again. The tears were streaming down her face as she called out for help and then her eyes opened at his touch.

"Donna, it's me. I'm right here, it's Harvey." He was sitting at her bedside with his hands on her shoulders. She had just been imagining it all. Mike, Rachel and Louis watched from outside the room, her friend crying into her fiancé's chest. Harvey looked back at the nurse. "I'm not leaving her like this. You can give her the damn drugs, but I'm staying."

The nurse accepted defeat and administered the drugs to her. Donna watched Harvey while he stroked her hair, his eyes locked with hers. "Everything is alright. I promise I'm not going anywhere," he continued to whisper as her eyes slowly began to melt closed. "I'll be right here when you wake."

As she tried to hang onto his every word, the pain drifted off along with her.

…

The week was going by quickly for her. She was constantly in and out of consciousness the entirety of the week. He had kept his promise to her, he hadn't moved once. She managed to witness a few encounters Harvey had, had with Mike and Rachel, but each time he refused to listen to them. They both wanted him to go home and change or sleep or shower, but he wouldn't move. His face was starting to get scruffy and the bags were starting to show under his eyes from lack of sleep. She was worried about him, but she hardly had the energy to tell him.

…

The last day of the week had arrived and she was finally starting to feel energized again. Harvey had succumbed to his exhaustion and was asleep on her leg when she woke, his hand intertwined in hers. The feeling she got when his skin touched hers was like no other. She continued to watch his chest rise and fall, admiring how peaceful he looked. It was the first time he had looked so at ease in a week. She lifted her free hand and gently grazed the top of his head, allowing her fingers to brush through his hair. It wasn't her touch that had disturbed his slumber, but the doctor who had entered the room.

His head quickly shot up at the sound of Doctor Barns' voice, his hand losing contact with hers. She missed his warmth the second it had disappeared.

"Good afternoon. I'm sorry to disturb you both, but we have some good news. The tests we ran this morning all came back clear," the doctor explained, smiling as he finished.

"So, what does that mean?" She questioned.

The doctor looked over at Harvey as he prepared to answer her question. "It means as soon as we get the paperwork signed, you can take her home."

He quickly shot up from the chair, clearly still disoriented from only just waking up moments ago. He ran over to the doctor and quickly shook his hand once again. Once he was finished thanking the man who had saved her life, he leaned over the bed and excitedly placed a kiss on her forehead. His hand carefully slid down her face, cupping her cheek as he stared into her beautiful eyes. "Let's get you home, Paulsen."

"Not so fast. There are conditions to your release. We would prefer someone to be with Miss Paulsen at all hours of the day, at least for the next two weeks."

He still hadn't broken eye contact with her, still rubbing his finger on her cheek. "She can stay with me."

She had barely even realized what he had just said. Once she had, she began to panic. There was no way she could stay with him. What would happen when she tried to bring up what he had said at her apartment again and he can't tell her? She would have nowhere to run. She would be stuck and forced to watch as he continued to break her heart again and again. "I don't know if that's a good idea," she mumbled. "I think I should stay at my apartment."

His face quickly went from happy to confused in an instant. "Why? There's an extra bedroom at my place and I can-"

Donna interrupted, "I think it's better this way. I can ask my mom to come stay with me. I haven't even called my parents to tell them what happened yet."

"I'm sorry, I should have done that. I just wanted to wait until we had good news to tell them," he sighed. "How about we all take turns watching you at your place? I'm sure Rachel, Mike, and Louis wouldn't mind that. Don't make your parents come all the way down here to watch you when we all already have it covered. Please, let me do this for you," Harvey begged.

Harvey Specter knew exactly what he was doing. She could never say no to him when he got like this. While her body was telling her to decline his offer, the words that came out of her mouth next did not follow that directive. "Okay, I'll let you all babysit me," she proclaimed, accepting defeat.

"I'll call Rachel to let her know what's going on and I'll also give Ray a heads up. He should be able to get the car here soon. Thank you again Doctor Barns." Harvey swiftly made his way out of the room to complete his calls.

…

Harvey was right about Ray's speed. He was there to pick them both up within ten minutes of her signing the release papers. Another condition for her being let out of the hospital was that she had to allow someone to wheel her outside. Harvey was more than happy to take on the role. When she finally reached the door, the second the air hit her face she felt alive again. Harvey swiftly guided her wheelchair to the car, where he was careful in getting her safely situated in the vehicle. He ran around to the other side, taking a seat next to her.

"It is so great to see you, Miss Paulsen," Ray cheered.

Donna reached her hand out, placing it on his shoulder. "Thank you, Ray. Not just for saying that, but for what you did. Harvey told me if it weren't for you making a call to the police that night, I wouldn't be here talking to you right now. I can't say thank you enough."

Ray looked back at Donna in his rearview mirror and gave her a nod. After that, they were off.

…

The drive to her apartment felt so strange. She had only been in the hospital for a week, yet she felt as though she didn't recognize anything. These were the same streets she always drove down, but to her, they weren't. She felt like she was in a foreign country. Nothing was familiar to her anymore. She hadn't even realized they were at her apartment when they came to a stop.

Harvey was quick to get to her side of the car and opened her door promptly. He carefully reached down to help her out of her seat, allowing his arm to reach around her hip while placing her arm over his shoulder gently. "Is this okay?" he asked nervously.

She nodded, giving him the okay to proceed. They cautiously made their way into her apartment building. The elevator ride up was filled with silence, neither of them knowing what to say in that moment. She could feel his eyes on her as they waited to reach her floor. She could feel his breath giving warmth to her neck as his hand pulled her closer to him. The feeling of his touch sent her to another realm.

She was brought back to reality when the elevator doors opened, arriving at her floor. They made their way to her door and he carefully leaned her against the wall while he unlocked her door. As the door swung open, the sight before her was not what she was expecting.

Everything was almost back to normal. Her pictures were hanging on the wall again. The carpet didn't have a stain in sight. It was almost as if what happened to her, never happened. She wished that was the case, but even though it didn't look like a reminder, her apartment still was. It triggered all of the memories from that night again, nearly taking all the breath out of her lungs. Her breathing became unsteady as flashes of that night entered her mind. She hadn't even noticed her body had started shaking as she slid down the hallway wall into a sitting position. Her knees inched closer to her chest, allowing her body to curl into a ball.

Harvey instantly bent down next to her as he noticed her state. "Are you okay? What's wrong?"

She was snapped back to the present when she heard his voice. "I'm fine. I just wasn't expecting it to look like that," she mumbled, allowing her eyes to look back at her apartment.

"Louis sent someone over to… I'm sorry I should've told you," he shook his head as the words left his mouth, letting his gaze fall to the ground.

Donna placed her hand on his chin and lifted his face until his eyes met hers. They stayed there for a moment, letting their eyes do the talking, saying everything their mouths couldn't. He got lost in her eyes, searching them for something. He wasn't sure what.

"Could you help me up?" she asked, ending their moment.

He let out a breathless 'yes' as he grabbed one hand and scooped his other around her back. As she reached her feet, the two were mere inches away from each other's face, her eyes staring straight ahead at his lips. This time it was him who broke the interaction, turning to face her apartment. She brushed it off and continued to follow him inside.

They made their way over to the couch where he carefully placed her down. He took a seat next to her, placing his arm on the couch behind her. "Do you want to talk about what you saw back there?"

She let out a loud sigh before answering. "I don't, but I feel like I should. It's just… I don't want to keep reliving it, but it keeps happening. The memories come flooding into my head, and I can't stop it. It's like I'm drowning in them. No matter how hard I try to keep them out, they just keep coming back." She closed her eyes, trying to hold the tears inside. "I'm sorry."

"Hey," he interjected, placing his hand on her back. "You have nothing to apologize for. You didn't do this. What happened to you was my fault, not yours."

"What?" she rebuffed. "Harvey, this is not your fault. You didn't do this to me, Gallo did. He would've killed me if it wasn't for you. I don't ever want to hear you say that again," she clarified, still in shock from his words.

His eyes had fallen to the ground once again. Harvey was clearly frustrated with himself for everything that happened, noticing him tense up before replying. "But, if I didn't provoke him, none of this would've happened."

"You did the right thing, Harvey. Just because Frank did something terrible, doesn't mean what you did was any less honorable. You put a bad man away. If what happened to _us_ doesn't convince you of that, I don't know what will," Donna confessed.

Harvey finally was able to make eye contact with her again. He was visibly struggling with accepting the fact that this wasn't his doing. It was his job to protect her, he had convinced himself of that a long time ago. He never wanted to let anything bad happen to her, and yet it did.

Gallo was absolutely right when he said that Donna was his everything. She was the person he couldn't live without. The only person he would put above himself. He would take a bullet for her. For the first time in thirteen years, he finally understood why.

"Donna, about that night. There's something I want to talk to you about. I started to mention it at the hospital, but I couldn't find the right words to say it," he drifted off.

"To say what?" she inquired.

"Knock, knock! Guess who stopped at that shitty Thai place you love?" Rachel's voice echoed throughout the hallway. Donna jumped at the sound of her voice. "I'm sorry, did I scare you? I texted you I was coming over, but no one answered their phones."

Harvey quickly stood up from his seat and nervously looked over at Rachel. "Well, I guess you got it from here."

"Harvey, what about-"

"I'll come back later," he interrupted. "Enjoy the food."

Donna watched as the man she loved, once again, ran away from his feelings.

**I hope you guys liked this chapter. It was a lot longer than all the others, which is also why it took so long. I'll try to have the next chapter out a lot quicker this time. If you enjoyed, please don't forget to leave your reviews! Xx**


	6. What You Deserve

**We're back! Thank you guys for being so patient with me and still showing so much interest in this story. We are nearing the end and I think I never want to get there. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter!**

Making his way out of her apartment, he was reminded of one thing: the second he closed that door, he would be shutting it on them, on any chance of Harvey and Donna. How many times was he allowed to run away from his feelings before she would give up on him? He truly was pushing the limit with this time, but he prayed that maybe she didn't even realize what he was about to talk to her about or at least, was trying to talk about. To ease his mind, Harvey had convinced himself that she hadn't had a clue what he was attempting to explain to her. It was Donna though, of course she knew.

For some reason, he thought she heard him. That night when she was slowly fading away from him in his arms, the moment he confessed every feeling he had ever felt for her, he figured she had heard it all. But seeing her face tonight when he attempted to bring it up, he knew she didn't. Or maybe she did, and she just didn't feel the same way for him.

Harvey Specter loved Donna Paulsen, plain and simple. There were so many ways to tell her that, but he could never find one. Maybe for Harvey Specter, no word would ever be good enough. No words could even begin to describe the love he had for her. She was Donna and he was Harvey, and to him, that meant something. He understood how important that was. It wasn't every day that someone walked into your life and got you, especially for him. With all of his baggage and flaws, she still accepted him. Deep down he knew all the right things he could say, but they were never enough, and he couldn't risk it. He had already said the wrong things once and he lost her because of that. There was no way he would ever let that happen again.

So, he loved from afar, effortlessly and endlessly, hopelessly and devotedly, forever. However, forever would have to wait because the door was still closing, but maybe there was hope for them.

Frustration kicked in as he entered the elevator, wishing he had stayed or that he turned back, wondering why he left in the first place. He needed to blow off some steam and there was only one person he could do that with.

When he got in the car, he told Ray where to go and quickly made a call.

…

Rachel had made Donna's living room into the dining room by the time she was through. Knowing her friend needed to rest, she made sure nothing would strain her. "Your ass is not leaving this couch unless you are going to bed," Rachel barked.

"Um, Rach?" Donna questioned. "While I'm grateful you care so deeply about my well-being, if I have to go to the bathroom, I'm going."

Both girls broke out into hysterics. It was a nice break from the seriousness that had overwhelmed their lives over the past week. "Oh, my goodness! Of course, you can. I'm sorry, I've officially turned into my mother," she stopped to take a breath before continuing. "I've just been so worried about you and now my mind is all over the place." She buried her face into her hands, quickly in embarrassment. The stress from everything that had happened shook everyone to their core.

Donna watched the happiness they had both been feeling moments ago erase from her face. The seriousness of what her friend had just mentioned took over her whole being. While they had always been light and playful with one another, Donna soon realized that what had happened to her affected more than just her.

"And I love you for that, but I don't want you to worry," she explained as she gave her friend's arm a light squeeze. While Donna's gesture was meant to comfort her, the look on Rachel's face said that it didn't do that. Rachel was more worried than Donna's mother was on the opening night of her first play in elementary school. Life or death was definitely a lot more serious than whether or not she would remember her lines, but she just wished there was something she could do that would ease her mind. It was affecting them; they weren't the same because of what had happened to her.

She knew that her friend wouldn't be able to fully understand without some sort of explanation. As hard as it was for Donna to talk about, her friend was worth it. "He took something from me that night," she paused, her breath hitching as she thought about what she was going to say next. "And I'm never going to get it back. I will always have this memory now, tormenting me whenever it chooses. But he's already taken so much from me, and I don't want our fun-loving relationship to be part of that, too. I don't want him to affect us because I don't want him to take anything else from me. He's taken enough."

"I'm so-" she drifted off, noticing Donna's eyes practically burning a hole through her. It wasn't what she wanted to hear anymore, and she finally realized it. "It won't, I promise. But what do you mean that he's taken enough?"

Her eyes closed hearing her friend's words. Her mind wandered off again to that night, like it always did. This time she was able to fight back to the present. "There's a part of me that will never be the same. I think I've finally accepted that, but that night he ruined something for not only me," she whispered.

"For Harvey?" Rachel interjected.

Donna allowed her eyes to find the floor, searching for some way to explain something she hadn't even fully understood. "The night it all happened, Harvey was so emotional. I mean, who wouldn't be when a crazy man was pointing a gun at your coworker?"

Rachel tilted her head to the side. "You know you're a lot more than a coworker to him."

"I know. I especially know now."

A look of curiosity appeared on Rachel's face. "What do you mean by that?"

Donna had led them to this moment. While she wasn't sure she wanted to talk about it, she knew she needed to because Harvey still wasn't. There was no more waiting for him to decide when it was okay to finally discuss the one thing that had been on her mind more than the attack. "Once the police arrived, I was barely conscious, but I was still decently aware of what was happening around me," she paused to take a sip of water. "I heard him."

"You heard him what?"

"Say he loved me," she stated bluntly. "God, I've waited years to hear those words from him, to know that he was capable of feeling that way about another person. But, no matter how badly I wanted to hear those words come out of his mouth, I don't know if I wanted to hear it that way. He was practically forced to say it because he probably thought I was taking my last breath in his arms. Gallo took that moment from us and now it's tainted."

Her friend was still in shock from learning about all of this. "Wow, I can't believe you heard all of that."

"I kind of wish I hadn't. There's a part of me that is glad I did, but something about learning it the way I had to hurts. Maybe it wouldn't have bothered me if he talked to me about it after I woke up, but every time I think he's tried to, he just goes back to his old ways. The only way to make sense of all of it, is that it was just a heat of the moment thing," she confessed, defeated by the realization. Of course, she didn't want to believe any of what she had just said, but how could she not?

It was one thing for her to know that he wasn't ready for a relationship with her, but to know that he was capable of having all of those feelings for her and did, made it impossible to breathe anymore. Donna always thought she knew everything about everyone, and for years she convinced herself that he didn't feel that way about her, but now she was well-aware of his feelings and he still couldn't say it to her. He has said plenty of things in the heat of the moment to her before, but what made this time any different? The only reason he hadn't taken what he said back yet, was because he thought she didn't hear him.

"I know it might seem that way, but the Harvey Specter I saw in the waiting room was not the same one you're describing now. I don't want to speak for him or assume anything, but I think you should consider giving him a chance to explain. I know finding the right words hasn't been his strong suit but believe me when I say that he has found them. Maybe he just needs a little push to get there," Rachel explained, smiling to prove that she fully believed it.

While Donna's face didn't agree with Rachel, her heart did.

…

He watched as the bartender placed the burger down in front of him, taking a sip of his fourth McCallan before allowing himself to dig in. Harvey was in his own personal heaven and yet, he still felt like crap. After the week he had been having, the drinks were well needed. It was the only thing that helped him calm down, that and seeing her.

"Hey, that's no fair. Why do you get your burger first?" Mike whined, envious of the good-looking food next to him.

Harvey nearly choked on his drink as he laughed at his friend. It was the first real laugh he had since the attack. "People like me better, I guess. I'm also way better looking," he scoffed. The alcohol was definitely starting to hit Harvey now.

"Yeah, for a sixty-year old man, you look great!" Mike mumbled, forgetting their conversation as he noticed his food arrived. "Now this is pure happiness," he swiftly added before giving Harvey the chance to reply.

Harvey was envious of how carefree his friend was. Meanwhile, his mind was racing a thousand miles a minute. He hated how he left things with Donna, but for some reason he felt like it wasn't right for him to tell her then. Rachel interrupting them gave him time to think about what he wanted to say. He was always saying the wrong things, and this allowed him to find the perfect words to explain to her what he's been wanting to since the day he met her.

"You okay there? I figured when you called to get burgers there was more to the story," Mike inquired, while wiping his hands off with his napkin.

Harvey attempted to wrap his head around the question. _Was he okay?_ How could he be when the woman he loved was nearly beaten to death? Not to mention the fact that she nearly died not knowing how he really felt about her. And the reason for all of those things happening, was because of him. The center of all the terrible things happening to the one person he wanted to protect from the world, was him. "Everything that has happened has just been a lot to process, I guess."

"I'm sure it has been. It's not easy to see someone you care about, hurting," Mike proclaimed.

"I wasted so much time over the years, you know," Harvey answered, not even noticing what Mike had said prior. "I've been so blind to my emotions; I couldn't access them. It's like I turned it all off for so long. All these years I've slept around and ignored everything that was happening around me. I even went to a therapist to attempt to figure them out and instead of running towards what was right in front of me, I went off and dated Paula. But, when I saw Donna lying there that night, it all hit me. I knew Paula wasn't the one."

"Because Donna is?" Mike interjected.

Harvey's eyes shot over to Mike. Not needing a second to think about his friend's question, he replied, "Yeah, she is. And she deserves to know it."

"So why haven't you told her yet?" he questioned.

A look of defeat appeared over his face. "I'm- I… I'm afraid," Harvey cracked, disappointment washed over him. "She's different. I can't risk saying the wrong thing to her. I can't lose her again. You saw what the thought of losing her almost did to me. You also witnessed first-hand what happened when she went to work for Louis. I'm worried I'm not enough."

Mike was baffled by the words coming out of his friend's mouth. He had never heard the great Harvey Specter ever doubt himself like this before. On the other hand, he also had never heard him share his feelings like this before. "Are you kidding me? You could say all the wrong things and that still wouldn't change the fact that she is in love with you."

Hearing those words nearly caused Harvey to choke on his burger. "She's what? Mike, you don't know what you're talking about."

"Yeah, I do. You both are crazy about each other. I saw it the first day I came to work for you. I think I may have even asked another associate why you guys never wore your wedding bands in the office," he chuckled.

"Mike-"

"I'm serious, Harvey. I saw you in that hospital room. If I didn't already know how you felt, that would've given it away in a second. The looks you both exchange with each other give it away. So, if you claim you love her as much as you do, don't let another second go by without telling her how you feel," Mike whispered, his tone almost begging.

"I did. Or at least I thought I did," Harvey let out defeatedly.

Now, his friend was even more confused than before. "What? When?"

"The night of the attack. I thought she could hear me. I still think she might have, which is why I'm even more afraid to tell her now. Maybe she just doesn't feel the same."

Mike wiped his face and threw the napkin onto his empty plate. "Look, if you let your fear take over, you'll never know how she really feels, and you might miss out on the greatest love of your life. Don't lose this one, Harvey," he encouraged, standing up to grab his wallet. "I have some business to take care of before I go home to see my _fiancé._"

And with that, Harvey watched his friend leave him alone with his thoughts at the bar.

…

"Are you sure you will be okay? I really don't want to leave you alone, but Mike said-"

Donna stopped her before she could continue. "Rachel, it's fine. I texted Harvey already and asked him to come back. I'm sure he will be here any minute. Plus, now that I'm in bed I am not going anywhere."

Rachel reluctantly listened to her friend. She quickly hugged her good-bye and gathered her belongings to leave. Donna watched the clock as it changed from nine o'clock to nine-ten to nine-fifteen.

For the first time since the attack, Donna was alone. While she thought she would be okay, an uneasy feeling washed over her. Squeezing her eyes shut, she attempted to slow her breathing. She didn't want to let the panic take over her once again. The fear of being alone however was so consuming.

The sudden bang on her front door caused her eyes to shoot open. All of the fears she had been trying to contain quickly took over. Her heart was beating out of her chest as she questioned whether or not that was Harvey at her door. Another bang and she let out a slight shriek, her mind no longer in control of her body.

She quietly tip-toed her way to the front door, the vase from her bedside table in hand. As she looked through the peephole on her door, relief flushed her body after seeing his face. _Harvey. _Why hadn't he just used the key?

As she swung the door open, Harvey tripped forward with it. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

He attempted to find his footing, but it became clear to her very quickly exactly what was wrong. He was _drunk._ "Don-Donna," he stumbled on every syllable. "Good, you're wake. There's a sumthin' I gotta tell ya." His eyelids were barely open as he tried to search for her eyes.

"You're drunk, Harvey."

"No, no, I'm noooot. Just wanted some liquid courage," he murmured.

Donna's emotions were a mix of pissed-off and concern, but mainly disappointment. She knew exactly what he needed the "courage" for. "I don't want to hear it. You can go sleep on my couch. There's blankets and pillows already out there."

As she turned to walk away, he reached out and grabbed her wrist to pull her back in. "Let go of me, Harvey. I just want to go to bed."

"But, Donna. I have words."

"Please, just let me go," she begged, freeing herself from his grip. "Goodnight, Harvey."

…

The sound of her door slamming shut finally brought Harvey back to their reality. He was losing her.

As he stumbled through her dark apartment, he managed to find his way to the couch. While he laid there on his back, he couldn't help but think about all the ways he has already fucked everything up. He also soon realized how uncomfortable her couch was. The rest of his night would be filled with tossing and turning.

The hours continued to pass and with every minute his disappointment only grew. Lifting his head off the pillow, he looked over at his watch, now sobered up and frustrated with himself. It's three in the morning and he still can't sleep. Knowing how badly he had messed up yet again was eating him alive. No matter what he did, he never could get it right with her. Somehow, he always managed to mess something up. Nothing he ever did was good enough.

As he stared up at her ceiling, losing his mind from all of his terrible thoughts, he heard something. The sound of a vase breaking caught his attention. He whispered, "Donna," checking to make sure everything was okay, but there was no reply. His whisper began to get louder and louder as he continued to call out her name, but there was still nothing.

Panic began to consume him as another shattering sound occurred. He attempted to get up off the couch, but something wasn't allowing him up. Then, he heard it. _Donna's screams. _She called out for him as he continued to try to get up, but someone was now holding him down. The darkness covered his face, but eventually he managed to make out the figure. It was him. Harvey was stopping himself from getting to her. Her screams continued to grow louder until finally… _he woke up. _

The dream wasn't real, but her screams were. "Donna," he called out, jolting up from his spot on the couch.

He ran toward her room, and when he entered, he realized that he wasn't the only one in that apartment having a nightmare. He rushed over to her side, grabbing onto her shoulders in an attempt to wake her up. "Donna, wake up. I'm right here. Wake up."

She jumped up to a seated position as she woke. Her whole body was shaking with fear. "Harvey," she whimpered, her breathing unsteady. "I can't-" she clenched her chest as she attempted to form words. Her breathing wasn't calming down, she was beginning to hyperventilate. A mix of sweat and tears dripped down her face, soaking the blanket under her. She squeezed her comforter in her hand, trying to center herself. Nothing was working.

"Donna, look at me," he begged as lifted her chin to find her eyes. "Just breathe and look at me. You are with me, you see." He reached out and took hold of her hand. His touch reminded her how to breathe again, letting the air fill her lungs.

Her eyes slowly shut as her breathing began to regain its rhythm. "Thank god." As the words left her mouth, her arms quickly embraced him.

"It's okay. It was just a dream, I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere." Harvey continued to brush through her hair as he pulled her into him. "I'm so sorry."

As they sat there, Donna's breathing slowly began to normalize again. Neither of them wanted to separate from the other but both knew it was bound to happen. Harvey was the first to pull away. As his arms untangled from her embrace, his hands found their way to her face, cupping her jaw. "Are you okay?"

She was still processing what that meant for her now, being okay. Would she ever be okay again? "I am now."

"I'm so sorry for the way I came back before," he whispered.

"Harvey, you don't-"

"No, Donna I do. It wasn't fair for me to do that," he explained. "I should leave you alone."

"No, you shouldn't," she reached out her hand, grabbing hold of his thigh. "Why? Why did you have to come back like that?"

A heavy sigh released from his body. "The truth is, ever since that night, I've been afraid. I thought I was going to lose you. I watched as you were bleeding out in my arms and there was nothing I could do about it," he swallowed, gathering his strength back after reliving those memories again. "I've always told you that I'd never let anything happen to you, but I did."

The tears began to swell in her eyes. "Harvey, you didn't. It was not your fault. You saved me. If you never came here, I wouldn't be sitting here talking to you right now."

His finger brushed along her cheek, wiping away her tears. "You are the person I care about most in this world. I can't believe it took this all happening for me to finally understand that... I love you. It took me so long to tell you because I didn't think anything I could say would be good enough to deserve you. You deserve way better than me. But the thing is, you make me want to be the best possible version of myself, for you. I want to be able to give you everything because you are my everything."

Donna stayed still, in awe of the man before her and disbelief of the words coming out of his mouth. "You are so deserving, Harvey. You just won't let yourself see that. You are a great man, and that's what made me fall in love with you."

Just like that, every fear that he once had was gone. Before he could respond, even in the dark, his lips still found hers. Every emotion that they both had been concealing for all of those years melted into their kiss. Everything finally fell into place.

As the passion between them grew, Harvey laid Donna back. He quickly found his way to her neck and her pulse point, giving every inch of her the attention she deserved. She was intoxicated by his touch, the need to feel every part of him overwhelmed her.

Suddenly she was brought back to reality as she pulled away from him. "Harvey, we can't," she paused. "Well, I can't. Not yet at least."

Disappointment consumed his body hearing her words. "Oh," he let out.

"Not because I don't want to. Because trust me I want to, but I'm not fully healed yet, and I want to be at one hundred percent when this happens," she teased, trying to make their situation better with a joke.

"Come here," he insisted as he wrapped his arms around her once more. "I waited twelve years for you, I can wait a few more weeks. Even though they will be the hardest weeks of my life, I will suffer for you."

**I hope this chapter lived up to all your expectations. If not, let me know in the reviews!**


	7. In Your Arms

**Hi guys. I am back again after months of being away from writing. I am sorry for this chapter taking as long as it did, but I needed the time to myself. I'm extremely proud of myself for getting this done and coming back to it. I hope it's worth the wait. With that being said, enjoy!**

A morning person was the last thing he would consider himself. But for the first time in his life, Harvey Specter was excited to wake up. He wasn't dreading making his coffee or getting ready for work because he knew that when he woke up that morning, she would be lying next to him. Even better, he realized she was wrapped tightly in his arms when his eyes carefully opened.

His senses were overwhelmed by her lavender scent and the warmth of her skin on his. He didn't think it was possible for her to get any more beautiful, yet there she laid, skin glowing and hair glistening from the sunlight peeking through her curtains. Van Gogh couldn't paint a more beautiful picture than the one before him that morning.

It was strange to him how right it all felt, waking up next to her. For years they pretended that where they were in that moment wasn't where they were meant to be, but how wrong they clearly were. They were both finally where they were supposed to be… together.

He was careful not to make any sudden movements that might disrupt her slumber, but of course she was Donna and even in her sleep she sensed that he was awake.

She let out a quiet yawn as she opened her eyes. When she noticed his arms around her, she pulled him even closer. "I never want to leave this spot," she mumbled, nuzzling her face in his arm.

Hearing her words reassured him of everything. "I definitely would not complain," he whispered as he placed a kiss on her head. "How did you sleep?"

Donna turned over in his arms to face him. "Much better with you here." Her hands found their place on his cheeks as she pulled him in for an overdue kiss. His taste consumed her, never wanting her lips to leave his again. She could get lost in his embrace, his fingers intertwined with her hair, but she couldn't. Reluctantly, she drifted away from him, letting her forehead rest on his.

He could sense her disappointment with their situation. They both wanted this for such a long time and now they could finally have it. Except they couldn't have it all. He craved every inch of her, but he knew she needed time to heal. "How about you stay here while I go make us some breakfast? We can eat in bed and watch a movie."

"I say that sounds like a great idea as long as the movie is _Mamma Mia!_"

Harvey grunted hearing the title, causing Donna's mouth to fall open in shock. "You did not just whine over Meryl Streep. I don't think we can do this anymore," she joked.

"It's not her, but Pierce Brosnan singing will give me a headache for the rest of the day."

"Well, I'll get you some aspirin then," she announced, placing a kiss on his lips.

At that moment, he thought of other things that would make him feel better, aspirin not being one of them. He wasn't sure why it was suddenly so hard for him to not want her. For years he was able to control himself around her, but suddenly she was his kryptonite.

"Fine. I'll go start making the pancakes," he mumbled, quickly hurrying out of bed to avoid getting lost in her embrace.

Turning over in bed, Donna mindlessly yelled out, "Don't forget the strawberries!"

Donna _and_ strawberries… he was doomed.

Luckily, he still remembered where she kept everything in her kitchen. He was almost done making the mixture, except he realized the sugar wasn't where it used to be. To avoid bothering her, he searched throughout the kitchen for it, opening and closing cabinets left and right.

"Looking for something?" she questioned.

As he looked up from the bottom cabinet, he couldn't help but notice how stunning she looked. She donned his white dress shirt and nothing else. Harvey swallowed heavily, trying to suppress the feeling that was emerging. "Sugar," he whispered as he stood up.

Shaking her head, she walked over and slid directly in front of him, her backside grazing him. As she reached up towards the cabinet, the shirt rose up with her, revealing her red lace that drove him mad. His eyes became glued to her. All the feelings he had been trying to suppress came crashing down on him all at once.

Once she retrieved the sugar, she immediately felt his excitement with him standing only inches behind her. She bit her lip on instinct, now starting to feel everything he was. Her breath hitched as she could feel his warmth behind her. Their want for each other consumed the apartment, making it harder to breathe.

Trying to come back to reality, she quickly turned around and passed him the sugar. "See? It was right in front of your face this whole time," she breathlessly joked, attempting to lighten the mood.

Now standing face to face with him, her eyes locked with his. They didn't need words to communicate what they wanted, but they also both knew they couldn't.

"You shouldn't be out of bed," Harvey explained, breaking the silence without moving from his spot.

"Right," she mumbled, her finger brushing against his stomach. "I should go." Within seconds, she turned on her heels and headed straight for the bedroom.

As if nothing had just happened, Harvey continued making the pancakes. Placing the last pancake on the plate, his phone began to ring. When he looked at the screen, he noticed the text from Mike.

**MIKE: Need you back at the office. ASAP.**

**HARVEY: I can't. I'm at Donna's.**

**MIKE: I'll tell Rachel to go over. I need your help.**

**HARVEY: Alright.**

Frustration set in as he realized he wouldn't be able to have his day with Donna. Maybe it would be good for him to get some air, though. He swiftly grabbed the tray and headed back to the bedroom.

Donna noticed his face and instantly knew something was wrong. "You have to go back into work, don't you?"

"Have I ever told you that I love it when you do that?" he asked, placing the tray down in front of her. "Mike needs help with something otherwise I would stay here with you. But I will come right back."

She sighed, looking down at the tray. "Fine. Don't think that this gets you out of watching _Mamma Mia_ though because the second you come back, I'm putting it right on," she giggled.

His hand brushed against her cheek as he smiled down at her. "You have yourself a deal, Paulsen. I'm gonna go hop in the shower."

"Better make it a cold one," she teased as she took a bite of a strawberry.

The smirk grew bigger on his face as he shook his head. "Oh, it will be."

…

The cold shower was exactly what he needed to clear his head. It was so unlike him to be this out of control, but he was seemingly defenseless to Donna's charm. As the water trickled down his chiseled body, he couldn't help but think of all the times over the years that he had wanted to be with Donna–when he watched her hit the copier when it would get jammed, the way she always knew exactly what to say to everyone without even knowing what was going on, the shitty Thai food they would share when they worked overtime.

Those late nights when she would stay just to help him sort through paperwork were his favorite. She would throw her hair up into a messy bun and take off her heels, all her armor suddenly vanished. Yet, in those moments when the city lights would brighten her whole being, that was when he found her most beautiful. He especially loved the vulnerability she had when she was no longer COO Donna and just his Donna. It was those tiny moments that told him she was his person.

The sound of shattering glass interrupted his thoughts as he jumped out of the shower and ran toward the door. Dripping everywhere and barely holding the towel to himself, he took in the sight before him.

Donna was hiding under her comforter, which was shaking with her fear. The glass that was once filled with orange juice, was smashed all over the ground. Carefully making his way around the broken pieces, he found his place on the bed. "Donna?"

Her breathing became loud and irregular, causing Harvey to panic as well. He attempted to pull the covers off of her, but she wouldn't budge. He tightened the towel around his waist as he made his way under the blanket. He couldn't tell if the sheets had been dampened from him or her tears. While her eyes were tightened shut, he could see the tears still escaping. "Donna. I'm right here," he whispered, wiping the tears from her cheek. His hand hovered there for a moment, waiting to see her response. She was still shaking, but her movement began to slow as his voice continued to soothe her. "You are here with me. As long as I'm here, no one will hurt you ever again."

Inching closer to her, he wrapped his arms around her, cradling her from behind. She caved into him and succumbing to the pain let out her cries. "I got you," he explained, brushing her hair out of her face while placing a kiss on her head. They stayed there until she realized where she was. There was no Gallo, no pain, no hurt… only love exuding from him.

She allowed her head to rest on his bare chest, steadying herself with his heartbeat and warmth. "Thank you," she mumbled, still recovering.

"Donna, I think you should talk to someone," he stated, knowing how sensitive the topic was. Proceeding with caution, he began, "I will always be here for you, you know that, but this isn't healthy. More importantly, this isn't you."

"You're right."

"Wow, I never thought I'd hear that coming from you," he chuckled. "Sorry, I had to. It was right there," he apologized, realizing that maybe it wasn't the right time for jokes. "I know a great therapist though."

"You also know a terrible one too," she sassed back. That was the Donna he knew and loved. "Sorry, it was right there," she repeated, laughing after all was said and done.

"Doctor Lipschitz. He really is great. I'll give him a call." He began to remove the comforter, finally allowing them to get some air. They remained there for a moment before he saw his lack of clothes. "Maybe I should get dressed first."

She hadn't even noticed that he had only been wearing a towel the whole time. She started biting her lip, thinking about the fact that he was naked under that cloth. "Yeah, you should," she agreed, attempting to come back to reality.

Mentally, she realized that she really did need to go talk to someone. She had just gone from a Gallo nightmare to sexual fantasies about Harvey in the matter of a minute. Trying to shake it all off, she proclaimed, "I'm gonna clean that mess up and then take a shower."

He noticed her staring and responded, "Better make it a cold one." His smirk was apparent as she crawled out of the bed.

"You're an idiot."

…

The car ride to the doctor's office was filled with silence. This was the first time Harvey had seen her nervous for anything.

Donna was always confident in herself and everything she did, but today she didn't know what to expect when she walked in the door. She was always helping people with their problems, yet she never needed help with her own. There was a sense of pride in that, but now it was a feeling of helplessness that filled her instead.

When they arrived, Harvey quickly got out of the car to open her door. As they stood face-to-face, worry consumed him. "I'll be back to pick you up as soon as you're done. You call me if you need me, okay?"

She nodded and swiftly stole a kiss. "Thank you. Not just for this, but for _everything_."

"_You_ are everything. Now, go talk to Stan," he pleaded, his eyes begging her to come back to him.

As she walked up the stairs to the office, she turned to steal one last glimpse of him before going in. That look gave her all the strength she needed to open the door and walk inside.

…

Walking through the halls of the firm felt different. The place had become foreign to him because... she wasn't there. From where he stood, Donna was the firm and without her, it was empty. This was the last place he wanted to be at the moment, but Mike needed his help and he couldn't say no.

As he turned into his office, he announced, "Mike, this better be good."

"The Webster case is proceeding tomorrow, which means you need to get ready for court," Mike interrupted.

"What? What the hell happened to our motion to delay?" he questioned angrily.

Mike sighed and continued. "The motion was until you and Donna were out of the hospital. Once the other side found out you were both out, they rescheduled it hoping to throw you off."

"Shit," Harvey mumbled under his breath. "Do you know the case?"

Confusion set in after hearing Harvey's question. "Yes, but why does that matter? It's your case."

"It's not anymore. It's yours," he stated.

"What? Harvey-"

"Donna needs me right now, Mike," he snapped. "I was planning on telling Louis that I'd be taking a leave of absence for the next two weeks before you texted me. I can't be here and give her what she needs, so I'm choosing her."

What was confusion quickly changed to a smile of relief on Mike's face. "You told her."

"I did." The words caused Harvey's smile to grow wide as well.

Mike stood up from his desk and walked around. "I'll see you in three weeks," he said, reaching out his hand.

"I'll see you in three weeks," Harvey replied, turning their handshake into a hug.

…

Three weeks flew by. They had fallen into a routine with each other. First, breakfast in bed along with a movie of Donna's choice. That would be followed by driving to her appointment with Stan, during which Harvey waited right outside until she was done. Each day after her session, Harvey would get takeout from a new lunch place to see which restaurant they should go to once she was healed. The list became longer and longer as the days went on.

It wasn't always smooth sailing with them. There were days where Donna thought she couldn't get through it, but he was always there to tell her she could. The most important part of her recovery was having him right by her side through it all.

She proved to be a fighter, making progress with every passing day. The only thing that mattered was that she got better, and she was doing just that. The night terrors occurred less over time along with the panic attacks. The sound of a car alarm or a dog barking no longer had a panicking effect. Everything she thought Gallo had taken from her was finally back. Donna was finally Donna again.

However, the most difficult part of being with each other over those three weeks, was not being _with _each other. All of those days together just added gasoline to the fire that had already been burning for twelve years. Every second of every day, they craved each other. From the stolen looks to the touch of the others skin on theirs, they wanted to be with each other.

The most important thing about the three weeks, however, was the fact that it proved it wasn't just about sex for either of them. The conversations between them never ended, even being with each other 24/7. They made each other laugh and cry, but most importantly, they were happy. While they may have fallen into a routine, every day felt like a new adventure for them.

It's hard to find that in a person, but they both noticed it, especially Harvey. After the first day of being home together, he knew that he was finally done. All the girls and one-night stands were finally behind him because he was finished. Donna was it for him and that made all the years of pain and longing worth it.

The last day had started like every other, except today Donna's appointment wasn't with Stan but with Doctor Barns. She was finally going to know if she was fully healed. She wanted nothing more than to move past this all and this was the final step in the process.

She had been counting the days until she could finally be herself again. If she got cleared, she could finally get out of her apartment to do actual things like shopping and work. This was the final step in being normal again which she finally realized was possible with the help of Lipschitz.

As she patiently sat in the waiting room, the door finally swung open along with her name being called. She gave Harvey's hand a quick squeeze followed by a look of courage before getting up to enter.

It felt like she had been in there for hours when she had only left him just a few moments ago. He hated being apart from her now. Especially today, he wanted to be there with her, holding her hand through it all. It wasn't the end of the world if she didn't get cleared, just another bump in the road that they would overcome… _together_.

He anxiously flipped through some gossip magazine that he was hardly paying attention to. His mind was racing a thousand miles a minute thinking about what could be going on within that room. He wouldn't be himself if he hadn't worried about every worst-case scenario possible while he waited. Being consumed by his mind, he hadn't even noticed her come out of the room.

He stood up immediately, waiting to hear how it went.

"Let's go home," she whispered in his ear.

Confused, he asked, "What did he say?"

A tear began to stream down her face and he instantly felt her pain. "Donna, I'm-"

"He cleared me. I'm completely healed," she chimed in. "These aren't sad tears, Harvey. They're happy ones."

He let out a loud sigh of relief as he pulled her in for a kiss filled with love and passion. The saltiness of their tears mixed in with the others' taste as she deepened their kiss. They had forgotten they were still in the waiting room as the world slowly drifted away.

Coming up for air, she reluctantly pulled apart. "Take me home," she exclaimed.

"That can wait," he explained. "First, I want to take my _girlfriend_ out on a proper date."

Their smiles grew wider as they headed toward the door hand-in-hand.

In that moment, they finally realized that they were about to have _everything _they had ever wanted.

**Thank you so much for reading. Special shout out to my wonderful beta, Brittany (sbstevenson2). You are a treasure. As always, don't forget to leave your reviews and feedback. I love hearing from you guys and I appreciate you guys taking the time to do so. So much love to you all -elle**


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